Random contacts...why?

[Me and myself]

Hi my friends

 

To cut a long story short, my ex broke-up with me 2 years ago, after a 3 months relationship. Her reasons: this relationship was a rebound from her side.

I went immediately in NC. I explained her it would be very painfull to me to be her friend.

Since then I've been in several months long periods of NC, interrupted by intermitent contacts. Now I'm in my 7th month of one of those periods.

My "problem" is that I think she knows I'm still not healed. I say this because if she was sure that I would be over her she wouldn't wish me happy birthdays, wouldn't send me random e-mails with funny stuff (not specifically to me but I'm in her contact list yet), etc.

I never replied to her. If she was sure that I see her as just a failled relationship she would have not been "trying to test the waters". I believe this is what she does...she keeps in silence, never contacts me for several months and suddenly....bum, starts to send those e-mails for several weeks...and then stops again for months.

I wonder why she does this and insists?

 

Does anyone went through this? How did you dealt with it? Were they feling sorry for you or are just random and crazy as only an ex can be?

 

M&M

[scornandtorn]

My vote is for "random and crazy", as you put it. I went through something similar and it drove me insane.

 

I tried politely asking her to stop, changing my phone numbers, threatening to petition for a protective order, to finally getting a restraining order against her.

 

That did the trick and I am so grateful that I can finally continue the healing process.

[ErikT]

I'm confused....

 

You are talking about a relationship you had 2 years ago that was a total of 3 months in length?

 

She sends you and a bunch of other people jokes and stuff for a couple of months and then stops sending you generic emails.

 

And you are asking why does she insist on contacting you when, 2 years later, you are not healed after a 3 month relationship?

 

Do I understand the question here?

[Me and myself]

Do I understand the question here?

 

Yes, that's exactly that!

[ErikT]

Wow.

 

My suggestion would be to mark her email address as spam so you don't have to even see them.

 

My guess is that she still has you in her contact list and goes on "email binges." Sends out lots of the junk and then realizes how annoying it is! Or she gets busy and doesn't have time to send out the junk. Either way, I doubt she is doing it to "test the waters."

 

Sorry to be the one to break it to ya...

[Me and myself]

I just find strange why she sends them and then stops, then sends again, then stops.

If I had someone in my contact list and was used to send them junk mail, I would do it in a regular basis, don't you think?

 

Sorry to be the one to break it to ya...

 

You can't break something that's already broken.

[High5girl]

Better yet, why not ask her why she does this b/c it could be for any reason? I don't think it's a good idea for you to make contact with her. But dude, it was only a 3 month relationship that happened 2 yrs ago. How serious can one get in 3 mos?

I have to totally agree with everyone here. Get a new phone number, bounce her emails and if you want, tell her not to email you anymore.

Perhaps she stays in touch b/c she feels it's been enough time for you to heal. Either that, she wonders how much leverage she still has.

but 2 yrs later? wow.

Obviously her contacting you isn't helping you. You gotta change your healing process b/c what you are or have been doing hasn't helped.

[Me and myself]

I don't want to contact her, and I won't.

it was only a 3 month relationship that happened 2 yrs ago. How serious can one get in 3 mos?

 

I don't really know why I'm still feeling not healed after 2 years. This has never happened before.

 

Perhaps she stays in touch b/c she feels it's been enough time for you to heal. Either that, she wonders how much leverage she still has.l.

 

That's what I think. But that leverage thing...why would she do that?