Does this really happen?!

[forever1130]

How often do people end up marrying their first bf/gf? It doesn't seem like it happens very often but there has to be a few out there! And do you think this is a good or bad idea?

[alli]

I think it works for some people. I can think of several people who started dating when they were around 16 & now, 8 years later they are engaged or married. But I'm not one of them so I couldn't tell ya!

[girl68]

I suppose to each their own. We've all heard the great sucess stories... On here, TV through friends parents who have "been together forever" idea.

 

But from my personal view, and experience through my friends and my own it is a bad idea. Sometimes one or both parties seek what they think they missed. They have thoughts of the "grass is greener on the other side" and in too many cases one party ventures over to the other side to have look, or taste.

 

I think that one needs to find out what they really want through having things they don't want. This of course is an opinion.

[Timebandit]

I think this is a very limited phenomenon outside some very specific cultures (it is f.ex. normal in some religious circles).

[forever1130]

 

But from my personal view, and experience through my friends and my own it is a bad idea. Sometimes one or both parties seek what they think they missed. They have thoughts of the "grass is greener on the other side" and in too many cases one party ventures over to the other side to have look, or taste.

 

I guess this is the kinda the reason I asked in the first place. Me and my bf have been going out a year and while I'm WAY to young to be thinking about whats gonna happen that far in the future, he's at the point in his life when it seems like he'll be wanting to settle down soon (he's 22 btw). I have no desire in "testing the waters" and seeing what else is out there, cause even the thought of losing him scares me. And even though im still several years away from even thinking about getting married, every now and then it crosses my mind and i wonder what the possibilities could be of us getting married are being that he is my first bf.

 

I guess i jsut like hearing stories with happy endings about others who have expirenced similiar things. Makes me think it could actually happen

[MattW]

Depends on the person. Also depends on exactly what kind of situation you're talking about, too... Do you mean a relationship in which both people are each other's first significant other? Or is this extended to relationships where one person has been in other relationships but the other person hasn't?

 

Using myself as an example (never been in a relationship, or even had one little innocent date, for that matter), I feel pretty confident that I wouldn't mind if my first (and only) relationship led to marriage. I'm sort of a "one woman" kinda guy. If I could find a girl that I was super compatible with, I wouldn't be taking any kind of risks that would mess that up (cheating, etc.).

 

Of course, I have to admit, I'd prefer to be with a girl who has a bit more dating/ relationship experience, because otherwise, I'd be a bit concerned that they'd become curious about what else is out there (like another poster said), and would stray away. I think that's kind of a reason I don't really pursue any girls, because many of them in my age range are still at a younger phase where they just want to "have fun". Lots of people my age seem to be into random flings and hook-ups, "friends with benefits", and all-around immature relationships that just don't seem to work out in the end. I never really went through that "phase", and I seem to have skipped ahead to wanting something more meaningful and "grown up". I guess it's just a matter of waiting for the rest of my peers to catch up to me, huh? Heh... Ah well, just my two cents.

[forever1130]

Well in my situation, im very much like you.

 

My boyfriend has been my first kiss, first guy i said "i love you" too, first guy i went on a date with... everything! on the other hand, im not sure how many relationships he's been in but i know his last one lasted 4 years, so he's definitely more experienced than me. And i also feel the same as you in that i dont want to screw this up. Good things like this dont come around too often, so why in the hell would i mess it up by seeing if the grass is greener on the other side, only to realize its nothing but dead grass and in the meantime ive lost the best thing to happen to me.

 

jsut my thoughts.

[girl68]

It can happen. It does happen. And for being young you're in a good place that you realize you're much too young to be thinking about marriage. Good, smart head you have.

 

Even at 22 I think that is awefully young to be thinking about marriage, especially for a guy.

 

Give it many more years and see. At 17 and even 22 your life will change sooo much as you grow up and despite you loving eachother your life might not be compatiable when you're in the mid-20s. A 5 year realationship is nothing when you're 17, I know I had one. On the other hand at 24 (he 31) a 2 year relationship, living together is everything- where's the ring?! (I kid, in seriousness

 

Just be young, have fun- when you're old you wish you're young!

[Jelina]

Well Ive been with my first boyfriend for 4 years, were supposedly getting married, but I'm not sure how that's gonna work out anymore.