Hes with someone else in under a week.

[Hannah13]

My now ex and i are officially done...again. A few months ago he broke up with me, wanting to party and do "what he wanted without a gf". This lasted for a few months, he broke NC twice, then i returned to it when he still didnt want a gf.

 

A month ago he was back AGAIN, only this time was different. He wanted me back as his gf, and did everything to get me back. Roses, showing up with cute things, cooking me dinner and bringing it to my work when i got off my shift...everything you wish a guy would do for you.

 

Stupidly though, i was afraid of getting hurt again, i didnt take the break up well last time, it took me alot to even stop crying everyday. He had just recently slept w/ a coworker of mine and though we were not together, i had strong feelings about it because sex to me is not something you just do with people you are not seriously dating. I also thought him coming back at this particular time was weird, it was just days after he slept with her, and apparently from what she told me, he stopped halfway through and left. Well, because i was hurt and confused and a little cautious that he was back, i told him i had done stuff with a friend of mine whom my ex hated, just cause i felt like i had to 'even the score'. This info was not true...but i kept lying all month.

 

Once my ex got me back a week after he came back, i was very cold and mean to him, like i was before the break up 3 months ago. I pushed him away, in a nutshell. He finally got sick of it and a little under a week ago we 'kinda' split. It wasnt really a clean break or official...until now. He has been saying he was done with me and didnt want me and to f off. I pulled out all the stops and told him how i truly felt, and he understood but at the same time didnt want me. This whole week ive been trying so hard, and now i found out he's with someone else, though not 'officially'. Hes been giving her rides and i guess theyve done stuff already. Today i told him the truth about everything, even the guy, and he said he officially doesnt want me.

 

 

I am so sick with myself. I cant believe i pushed away the only thing ive ever wanted. I have so much regret, and hurt now too because of this new girl. I dont even know what to do now. I love him with all my heart and would have died for him, and now there is nothing i can do. I also cant believe he let me try to get him back all week without telling me about this girl. He says he still loves me but doesnt want me. I dont know where to go from here..all this happened in under a week...any advice?

[Strung_Out00]

Well, it seems you succeeded pushing him into another persons arms. I don't understand why you would treat him coldly, have him leave you, and then pour your heart out to him. Truthfully, I would've left you also. I wouldn't know what to believe. He came back to you and you totally shut him out. What did you expect him to do? Hang around and be treated like dirt?

 

Then you lied about hooking up with someone to "even the score"? You shouldn't be trying to get revenge. Despite your views on sex, he was single and has the right to act accordingly.

 

As for advice, I think you pretty much smashed this one into little pieces. Nowhere to go here but move on. I'm sorry.

[looking_up]

WOW, don't for one second get down on yourself! Was someone who will drop you any time they are feeling frisky for other girls 'the only thing you ever wanted'?

 

You loved him, and its natural and normal to struggle letting someone you love go. And jealousy is normal as well. YOU did nothing wrong. Use what you've learned from this relationship to help you find a healthier one in the future, you will find someone far better.

 

My cousin went through something similar, every summer her bf would break up with her so he could 'be free' then come back in the fall, needless to say he eventually ended up cheating on her in the 'on' times as well. If someone truly loves you they won't let you go for any reason.

[Hannah13]

This is just so hard now. It makes me sick to my stomach, and the worst is i know i cant fix it and i know its my fault. I just dont know what to do from here.

 

this girl also knew he was working things out with me, im quite mad about her just jumping in with him.

[yankeefan74]

Well, it seems you succeeded pushing him into another persons arms. I don't understand why you would treat him coldly, have him leave you, and then pour your heart out to him. Truthfully, I would've left you also. .

 

Dude...the guy left HER, and told her he wanted to party and not have a GF. It's only natural she'd be afraid of getting hurt again. Most people would.

 

It's like you didn't even read the first part of the post. Far too harsh.

 

I mean, the guy tried to get her back, but that's not a guarantee that you'll get someone back. He shouldn't have broken up with her in the first place for really stupid reasons. Sometimes people get back together, sometimes they don't - but there are consequences for mistakes.

[yankeefan74]

i know its my fault. .

 

You shouldn't have lied, but there's enough blame here to go around. He'd hurt you by breaking up with you...and regardless of whether he was single or not, his sleeping with a co-worker also is still going to hurt...

 

No reason to just blame yourself.

[Hannah13]

I also have to see him, i work part time with him at a grocery store near my home...Before, i always made sure we didnt work the same days, but they instituted a new policy for requesting days...so ill see him prolly 3-4 times a week. How should i handle this? It already hurts so bad knowing that hes with this girl everyday...doing stuff i cant even imagine...

[yankeefan74]

I work with my ex as well. I'm not going to lie, it can be torture. Your options are to deal with it, or try and find another job.