He is 16 years older than me

[Little Pixie]

I have just started dating a man who is 40..I am 24... I havent told my mother yet and to be honest I dont know how to.

 

The guy I am dating took me out one night and my mother had no problem until I started hanging around with him more. She started asking questions like "why does a man that age want to hang around with a girl your age"...The thing is, my mum used to be with a guy who was 16 years younger than her. She was with him about 4 years! There was no problem then.

 

I brought that up and she said it was different. The guy is really nice. I am a single mum and he is a single dad so he knows what it means to be a parent, unlike a lot of guys my own age. We are also both punks so we ahve loads in common.

 

I dont know what to do really. My friends are all supportive. They seen what I went through with my last bf who was 6 years younger then me and agree that an older man would be more mature and understanding.

 

I need some advise. If I told my mum and she was angry about it she would be very difficult and refuse to baby sit my son etc just to stop me from seeing this guy. I mean, he dont mind taking my son and I out for the day but we obviously need time to ourselves...

[Prescina]

There are always consequences when you follow your heart. Some good and some bad. You need to sit your mother down and have a heart to heart with her. Your an adult and can make your own decisions and if she can't understand that I would say it's her loss. Hopefully she'll come around. Best of luck.

[Little Pixie]

My mum is not the easiest person to talk to. I have never been able to talk to her. Although I think I may have to as I really quite like this guy. I mean, my mum shouldnt have a prob as her last bf was way younger than her.

 

She also had a huge crush on a guy a year younger then myself..that would be a 26year age gap!!

[Prescina]

It's quite different if it's your child. She may be happy with large age-gap relationships for herself, but not for you. You are her baby and she wants to protect you. It can't hurt to try to open up to her, talk to her, mothers can be more receptive than you think.