ask out or to not ask out

[Blackhawk2009]

so i have this little problem...i have been talking to this pretty girl that i met via a dating website and I have begun to start liking her. Well we talk on the phone almost every night so far at least but we still have not gone on an actual date yet. I have asked her out once before said i would like to take her out to dinner..but she said she isnt ready.

 

Now she told me the reason why and it's because she was hurt real bad by her last boyfriend..is seeing a therapist right now about it. She said she likes me and doesn't want to scare me away. Now i want to ask her out again for friday when i call her tomorrow she has been seeing her therapist for a few weeks now. But do you guys think its too soon or should i just go for it.

 

She seems to be more into me now than earlier on..i told her to call me instead of me always calling her and she did call me tonight so i might take that as a semi sign she wants me to ask her out.

 

eh i need help on this 1

 

p.s. i am talking to other girls too so its not like the end of the world

[waveseer]

I advise you to concentrate on the other girls and give her time to heal properly.

[abitbroken]

I wonder why she is on a dating site if she is not ready to date. I can understand not wanting to meet someone immediately to try to feel them out or making sure you meet in a safe place the first time. But if someone acknowledges that they are still in a deep healing process and are not ready for someone new they shouldn't yank someone along.

 

When I started to lift my head up during my seperation, i browsed a site and was excited to find some guys who seemed like I would like to date, but I stopped myself because my divorce isn't final and secondly, I am plain not ready in truth even though my marriage was over for awhile and I really desire male companionship. So i am giving myself more time. There will be a guy out there for me to meet when I am ready.

[Shyguy24]

I would ask her out for coffee, before asking her out for dinner. Even better catch a movie and if it get late..hey catch some dinner.

[ghost69]

stop pursuing her. let her tell you she's ready and move to the other girls.

[Dating Coach]

so i have this little problem...i have been talking to this pretty girl that i met via a dating website and I have begun to start liking her. Well we talk on the phone almost every night so far at least but we still have not gone on an actual date yet. I have asked her out once before said i would like to take her out to dinner..but she said she isnt ready.

 

Now she told me the reason why and it's because she was hurt real bad by her last boyfriend..is seeing a therapist right now about it.

 

That would be enough for me. * * * is this girl doing on a dating website if she isn't ready to meet guys? Sounds to me like she just wants the attention and is using this as an excuse to not offer anything back.

 

Even if by a small chance this is the truth (and I am willing to bet it isn't) I still wouldn't stick around. Pursuing a girl with stated major issues would say little of my self respect and my confidence in my ability to find a girl without issues. If once the issues are in the past and she is willing to do something then, I would have to reevaluate her and the situation at that time to see if I want to risk it.

 

She seems to be more into me now than earlier on..i told her to call me instead of me always calling her and she did call me tonight so i might take that as a semi sign she wants me to ask her out.

 

That's not a sign of her wanting you to ask her out, that is a sign that she enjoys the attention you give her. I wouldn't be giving a girl this much attention if she is refusing to go out with me. I will reserve that attention for someone who is actually interested in me and backs it up with her actions.

[Batya33]

I would tell her to get in touch with you when she is ready to meet in person but that you don't have time right now for any new e-mail penpals or chat buddies.