I've changed my mind!

[Lusif]

I started a sort-of FWB situation last month, with a guy I was previously close friends with. Before we got together, I used to go on about how I hate being in relationships, can't see myself getting married, think open relationships are perfect...

 

Now I'm regretting it, because I'm starting to not feel that way anymore. I really like him and eventually I think I would want a relationship with him. He doesn't know this, obviously, because I worry it'll scare him off. And I'd rather have something than nothing. We're both free to see whomever we like, and he's been sleeping with a girl... I hate the thought of this, but perhaps it's my own fault? I also used to tell him I fall for guys who are mean to me, and he's mean to me a lot in a teasing way... when I jokingly complain, he says he's only mean because I say I like it.

 

When I say 'friends with benefits', I suppose I should clarify that we only had sex for the first time the other day, and basically just do all the other physical stuff, though recently he's been cuddling and kissing me more, in a cute way as well as sexual...

 

So, should I try to tell him how I feel? Or not, just continue the way things are? Or just forget this whole thing...?

[kaoticbaby]

i think it's worth a shot. sure, he's sleeping with that other girl, but perhaps only because you said that that's what you want. in my experience, FWB's don't kiss and cuddle very often. if you really like him and think it could go somewhere, my advice is to let him know that your feelings have changed. if it freaks him out, then he's probably not mature enough for a relationship anyway, so no harm done really.

 

my 2 cents.

[Smoothie58]

You should tell him how you feel otherwise you are going to end up hurt! If he doesn't feel the same way, then you need to stop seeing him. I know that you might think something is better than nothing, but in the long run it will hurt MUCH worse. Talk to him and see what he wants - good luck!

[Shyguy24]

If you are certain about the way you feel, then you should go ahead and tell him. Although i would just be a little cautious in the sense, find out what his opinions are on relationships , that may not be open.

[Lusif]

I hate telling people how I feel! I have this belief that it should show, and if it doesn't then they don't care... senseless, I know...?!

[Lusif]

This week, I've sort of been attempting the 'just friends' angle - I haven't said anything, but he can probably tell I'm holding back. But we're always cuddling, and he spent the night in my bed last night and all we did was hold each other. Does he just want affection, or does he actually like me?

 

And the other night, he'd been with that other girl and after she'd gone, he came to see me? We don't really talk about the situation with her much, but for some reason he seemed a bit withdrawn - why, I don't know. I think I'm losing patience.