Being seen with another girl

[Maverick212]

has anyone ever gotten their ex to come back to them by having them see you with another girl? Even though you were the one they dumped

[Lionel Hutz]

Not really with another girl. She knew that I was talking to others and was on the verge of loosing me. She decided she wanted to work on it, and I was willing to.

[Maverick212]

Right, that's what i meant, i should have explained better. So, knowing you were with other girls made her come to you?

[SapphireNoir10]

I think its an immature way to get someone back.

 

Sure they MIGHT see you with another girl and want you back. Chances are its a momentary 'oh no they cant have anyone else' and they panic and take you back. Then the same issues and problems resurface and you end up getting dumped again.

[mijo]

I think if I saw my ex with another girl it would upset me a lot if i still had feelings for them, but it depends how she "sees" you?? Do you mean in front of her or pics of you with another girl?

 

If I knew another girl was interested in him it might kick me into telling him i still had feelings - but if i saw him out making a move on some girl in front of me i'd think he was being insensitive.

 

If my ex asked if i was seeing someone new, even if it wasnt true i'd always say "well not seeing anyone, a guy asked me out for a drink but he is away at the moment so not too sure what's happening there".

 

I guess it depends what you're hoping to get from it

[Maverick212]

i'm pretty positive it is immature. but i'm not doing it simply to get back at her. I'm bringing this other girl over to see if i actually like her, and if it accomplishes my ex seeing and coming to me great. But i know what you mean about past problems resurfacing, and believe me i wrote down every single argument me and my ex had and have worked on it. right now i feel as if she feels she can do what she pleases, and i'm still in her back pocket cuz she knows i still want to be with her. I want to show her that i wont be on her dragged around anymore. and i'm hoping this will show her that. Nothing else has worked thus far.

[Maverick212]

this is to mijo. i wouldn't make out with another girl in front of her, that's not classy, i'm not that type of person. I want to kind of test her with this, to see how she really feels. You know what i mean. I hate playing games but i dont have much choice really. honesty has gotten me into * * * * over and over again

[SapphireNoir10]

If you are interested in this other girl. then stop thinking about your ex. What does it matter if she sees you?

 

your moving on and thats the important thing, dont let yourself be dragged around.

[Maverick212]

well, i still love my ex, and want to be with her. I like this other girl too, but as to how much i dont know. My ex lives accross the hall from me, so one way or another she is going to find out. and if she actually asks me about it, well, then i'll know

[Lionel Hutz]

Right, that's what i meant, i should have explained better. So, knowing you were with other girls made her come to you?

 

Yep. "Thats my man" is what she began to think. Thats my flattering assumption. Sometimes we dont know what we want, and think we can pick up things and put them down when we need; like a screwdriver. Its complacency. Do your thing and she may not want to lose you. Its really a win win for you IMO.

 

Just dont use some poor female to bait her. Karma will get you for that.

[Maverick212]

lol, yea the girl i want to bring over is smokin hot too. So, who knows, we shall. My ex knows that i dont want to be with other girls as i have told her. But maybe this will get that shock and awe that i really need

[waveseer]

That sounds highly unfair to the other girl, don't you think?

[Maverick212]

she wants to do it lol

[waveseer]

Just because she's willing that doesn't make it right. But if you think it does than arguing with you about it is fuitless.

[browneyedgirl36]

Just because she's willing that doesn't make it right. But if you think it does than arguing with you about it is fuitless.

 

I agree. Maverick, you just posted this same thing a couple of days ago, about whether or not making your ex jealous would bring her back, and people told you the same thing. It MAY get her attention, but do you really want someone coming back just out of jealousy? Usually, reconciliations of this type are short lived.

 

You say that honest hasn't gotten you anywhere in the past? Well, that's probably because the person you were honest with simply wanted to move on, and it didn't make any difference what you said.

 

If someone doesn't want to be with you, all the games in the world aren't going to work, and all the honesty in the world isn't going to work either, but if I had to choose one of the two, I'd go with honesty.

 

It sounds like you're determined to do this, so...good luck with it.

[HeartGoesOn]

If they only wanted to come back to me for that reason, I wouldn't want them.

[Maverick212]

you guys are missing the point, this is not about getting her back with me. It's about trying to figure out if me being with another girl has any effect on her. If it has the slightest effect on her, then i'll know she still has feelings for me. and then i go from there

[waveseer]

You asked and almost every respondent has told you in so many words that they think it's a bad idea. You can keep asking but you may never get any support for your plan.

[Lionel Hutz]

Wait, lemme refresh? You are running a reactional experiment on your ex, and using another girl, whom is a willing participant to get a reaction out of your ex? Whats the point?

 

Move on man, seriously. Moooooove on.

[knightNshiningarmor]

I think its an immature way to get someone back.

 

Sure they MIGHT see you with another girl and want you back. Chances are its a momentary 'oh no they cant have anyone else' and they panic and take you back. Then the same issues and problems resurface and you end up getting dumped again.

 

exactly what happened in my last situation...said it before gonna say it again...better to be alone then with the wrong person my friend and most relationships that breakup do so for a reason.

[knightNshiningarmor]

trust me she does have feelings for you...most who break up and not to be with another person are going to have residual feelings....but those feelings have been conquered by the reality that you 2 are not meant to be together.. coming from someone where this wasnt my goal...but after breaking up with my ex in the past i then started seeing these 2 other girls(long story dont ask...fun story...but ya) anyway after finding out about them and myself being together she then broke nc of about 2 months and started calling me regularly and in the long run i ended up breaking it off with both girls...one of which i saw a real potential in and im still kicking myself for blowing it with her...anyway i got her back but within a few months the reason why she broke it off came back...we were just not the right fit...but i dont think it matters who dumped who...once someone comes into your heart for a while anyway she is going to have feelings and she will be jealous...but that doesnt change the fact that you 2 most likely arent right for one another...that being said i would invite that other chick out and have a good time...seriously...thats the healthiest way...dont look at it as a means to get your ex out but as a means to have fun.

[AwwGeez0107]

My ex broke up with me and I had started to move on and was being seen in public with other girls. I even got kinda serious with this one girl and my ex did everything she could to get me back. It turned out to be THE biggest mistake in my life even though I still loved her VERY MUCH. Well, her and I got back together and I shamefully, threw the other girl out on the streets. I wish I had stayed with that girl instead of going back to my ex. Things just weren't the same and it gradually turned into a living hell and we ended up splitting up a couple of times before cutting it off completely and I lost the greatest girl in the world because I thought I wanted her back. I'd say if you broke up with someone and you find someone then realize what a good thing you have. I can honestly say that is the only thing I regret in my life. On the bright side, I no longer talk to my ex and text and talk to the other girl every day (even though she has a boyfriend of two years...)

 

Things may be different for you but this is where I stand. Best of luck in whatever happens.

[Maverick212]

My ex is the most stubbron person in the world, she will leave it up to God, before deciding for herself. Seeing her with other guys, even though i know their just friends pisses me off and makes me want to go talk to her. Hell, she was hanging out with a gay dude and it made me jealous lol. I think it would be good for me to hang out wih other girls, and if it it makes my ex suspicious, and react, then great. But I wouldn't get back together with her if the day after she said lets get back together. That's not smart, we would fall into the same crap again that caused the breakup in the first place. I would take it extremely slow, and talk about our issues first before getting back. I jst want to get the ball rolling a bit, cause i know she wont, she's too proud of herself to initiate contact with me, even though she does still care, like she's told me.

[wizard71]

Women most definitely arent daft, so dont make the mistake of thinking she wont see through any games. Im not saying thats what you are doing of course. Just get on with your life and start seeing other women if thats what you wish, do it for no other reason that to satisfy yourself. How it affects your ex is impossible to say. She may come running, she may not, but for someone to be enticed through jealousy or guilt really isnt very healthy long term. I was canoodling with a gorgeous woman in a club and didnt even realise my ex was there til i looked up and saw her. Do i care what she thinks? No, its all about me now. This was a while ago and it certainly didnt make her come running, even if i had wanted her to. You will earn more respect by not flaunting it in front of her purposefully, but hey she dumped you right? You can do whatever you want, but do it for you.

[thedude27]

To answer your question directly, Yes. I have done that and had it work more than once. Jealousy is extremely effective way to get to someone.

 

 

I think the "should you do it question" has been answered.