I still cant talk to him - rant! :(

[suzexxx]

Im having trouble forgetting whats gone on recently with my boyfriend. He told me at the start of November that he was thinking of splitting up with me, at the time he said he wanted space (although we are already pretty much LDR).

 

I saw him again a few weeks later for my birthday and we just went back to being normal again. At the time i wanted to ask him so many questions, as to why he hurt me so bad. I didnt ask those questions for fear of ruining things again.

 

6 weeks on we are still back to normal, seeing each other once maybe twice a week if im lucky. This past week or so its been really getting to me, i am scared to get too close to him again incase he hurts me again. I know this is silly as we've been together for two years next April. I do try and speak to him and he insists he loves me and we are fine, so i dont push the conversation anymore.

 

I just want to say to him that after almost two years together i deserve to know where this relationship is going! I always thought after this amount of time i would know. We spoke about buying our own place together in the past, but we havent spoke about it for a while. Im just thinking i dont want to waste my time if he doesnt want the same as me

 

x

[waveseer]

Is there something that he does when you start to bring things up that concern you that makes you back down?

[suzexxx]

Well for a start i never know when the best time to bring up the conversation is. I brought it up last night after we'd had sex, as we always have a cuddle and a chat afterwards. I asked him if he loved me and if he thought we were on the same page and he said yes and asked me what i thought!

 

Most of the times i ask him he just gives one word answers or just asks me what i think. I just agreed with him last night, although i felt i should of said something. I also asked if he wanted us to be together for a long time, and he said he hoped so.

 

x

[waveseer]

How old are each of you?

[suzexxx]

I am 20 and he is 23. x

[waveseer]

You probably sense that if he were ready for a more permanent status to the relationship he'd be giving you signs of that. There is no way to tell for sure whether he has any plans for the future without asking. It seems like this is what you need to know and it's okay to ask. If you get the answer you don't want then you can be glad you found out now instead of in another two years.

[suzexxx]

When would be the best time to ask him this? x

[waveseer]

After dinner when his responsibilities for the day are over, his stomach is happy, but he's still vertical.

[suzexxx]

Ill give it a go! I havent made any plans to see him, although i know im seeing him on Christmas Day.

 

Thats another thing, i hate how i always seem to have to ask to see him. I feel that if i didnt ask, i wouldnt see him for weeks on end.

 

x