Do you think where you live contributes to your problem?

[steve33]

I live in the washington, DC area. This area attracts a certain type of person, someone who craves status and power, and usually money. I think besides NYC or LA, this is the worst place for a shy guy to live. What do you think about your area?

[waveseer]

Yes, my area attracts computer nerds. I'm not completely against that though, at least it's better than being in the epicenter for advanced salesmanship.

[Anjali S]

Yep...I know if I lived somewhere else I wouldn't be single Whenever I travel abroad or visit places I seem to attract some attention from guys but sadly not enough in the area where I live

[Amir M]

It has an influence but its not crucial.

There's guys in your area that are having a blast meeting girls or whatever you'd like to be doing as I'm writing this reply.

I used to live in Bern, Switzerland. Believe me, its small. I used that as an excuse to not push myself for years until I got sick of it and got over myself.

I know its more comfortable to rationalize why its difficult to meet people, but that temporary comfort, what's it doing for you in the long run? Is it worth it?

[Ramm Zwei]

I live in a podunk impoverished town on a Caribbean island populated by traditionalist and superstitious old people and simpletons who've never even gone out beyond the nearest city and would rather spend the rest of their lives living off of Welfare and raising low quality Paso Fino horses and racing them down the street. Yeah, nice place to meet quality women if your standards are as low as the rest of the people here.

[Amir M]

I live in a podunk impoverished town on a Caribbean island populated by traditionalist and superstitious old people and simpletons who've never even gone out beyond the nearest city and would rather spend the rest of their lives living off of Welfare and raising low quality Paso Fino horses and racing them down the street. Yeah, nice place to meet quality women if your standards are as low as the rest of the people here.

 

if its that bad, then move. I'm sure you have you're reasons for staying there, if they're worth it, well then appreciate the place for what it is, if not, get out.

 

no disrespect, but is this going to be a "lets share are excuses"-thread?

I get it, misery likes company, but do you want to stay in that company?

 

Cheers,

 

Amir

[Ramm Zwei]

Yeah it's basically because I'm too poor to get out of here. But if I could go anywhere it would be to Russia. The women are hot and don't care if you have "game" or not as long as you're foreign and have money and the place is so depressing to most Westerners that it would be the perfect place for me to go into exile. It's a dark and foreboding place, the people don't accept you at face value and only open up to you when they get to know you and it's the complete opposite of the sunny tropical "paradise" I live in.

 

However, you're right. If there is an upside to where I live, it is that it angers and depresses me so much that it inspires my writing. I write best when pissed off.

[Amir M]

haha, I don't know if that was ironic but the last part made me laugh. I'm like that to. Lately the content of my art is sooo shallow, since its been a while since I've been depressed, disappointed or pissed off.

there does seem to be a correlation there. Osho writes something about happiness being like a mountain stream, bubly, fresh but not that deep. Sadness on the other hand has strong tides and deep murky waters.

 

but dude, I've been to the Caribbean. the women wore gorgeous and pretty outgoing in my opinion. maybe not on your island. but then why don't you move a couple, that shouldn't be to expensive.

 

and what are you talking about. exile?

call me naive, but I feel there's so much beautiful places and people out there to explore and meet. But I guess you have to believe it to see it. (believing is seeing and vice versa)

[lost1607307474]

I definitely think where I live influences the type of person that I am and the type of things I look for. I live in an area of Australia where everyone is laid back, open-minded, carefree, and family-focused rather than money or career-focused. And this is exactly the kind of person I have grown up to be.

[somethngwrng]

I live on the North Shore of Auckland, New Zealand. It is notorious for pretentious women. So, yes.

 

My 24 year old friend who had never so much as kissed a woman went to the UK, found a great girlfriend within 6 months and is happy with her. This guy used to think I was awesome at picking up women. I am not awesome at picking up women.

[tom1607307597]

I live on the North Shore of Auckland, New Zealand. It is notorious for pretentious women. So, yes.

 

My 24 year old friend who had never so much as kissed a woman went to the UK, found a great girlfriend within 6 months and is happy with her. This guy used to think I was awesome at picking up women. I am not awesome at picking up women.

 

It's stories like this that make me want to just pack up and move to Japan, it would probably be easier to meet asian girls over there where something like 98% of the girls are Japanese. That or go to Europe, I heard somewhere they can be alot more open to new people and foreigners.

 

Right now where I'm living it seems like there's more chances to meet people than when I go home over the holidays because it's a much bigger city. My home town is just so small and considering it's a town for alot of old people to retire it's not so great for meeting people my age. Plus I live on the outskirts of town and it's pretty rural.

[steve33]

It's stories like this that make me want to just pack up and move to Japan, it would probably be easier to meet asian girls over there where something like 98% of the girls are Japanese. That or go to Europe, I heard somewhere they can be alot more open to new people and foreigners.

 

Right now where I'm living it seems like there's more chances to meet people than when I go home over the holidays because it's a much bigger city. My home town is just so small and considering it's a town for alot of old people to retire it's not so great for meeting people my age. Plus I live on the outskirts of town and it's pretty rural.

 

When I lived in Germany I would date a bit. But only because I got introduced, something that doesn't happen here at home..

[Amir M]

when I got to the states, it seemed way easier for me to meet people and it was the same for pretty much every new place I went.

every town and country has its pros and cons, even the small ones. its all about your mindset. I always have a easier time meeting people in new places because I didn't have the old excuses to hold on to.

[COtuner]

Not sure I totally buy this. I've moved 34 times so far, and the only place I noticed that was significantly different from the rest was the Bay Area. The guys there preferred girls of Asian descent and were openly against dating white women (never did figure that one out). Other than that, same same. It's up to you to find the places in your town where people are. (yes I know, some people live in isolated villages or whatever, but for the most part, this holds true. And I've lived in towns between 20,000 and 9 million residents)

[Blue Streak]

Where you live contributes to your problem just about as much as your attitude allows it to.

Yes, some locations may be better than others, yet attitude is everything. Amir M is right on and a perfect example. Those with a negative mindset are going to struggle no matter where they move.

[Crush85]

What do you think about your area?

 

There's girls in my area that I'm very physically attracted to. But they're not the type of girls that I want to be with.

 

If that makes sense.