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Ex Says, to Call...


deff808

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We been broken up for like little over a month now, we work with each other. I see her 3-4 times of the work week. I did the NC after thanksgiving. So its been about 2 weeks now, NC. I only seen her once outside of work, just ignored/kept the conversation to a minimum. I do ignore her at work, not to pay attention. Just say Hi, and Bye. Basically. Professional wise. Just keep it cool, i guess...

 

During that time period of NC and ignored her. She told me twice, out of the blues... "Call me if you need anything, or someone to talk to, just say whatever is on your mind, i hope everything is cool between us etc..."

 

I guess the NC, and not giving her the attention kills her!

 

What does that post to mean? If i call, i fall right back in the hole.

If i call, i fall back on her string etc...

 

I know one day, she will call. It is just matter of time. I don't wanna be the puppy!

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Yep, she may be rethinking this breakup. In my humble opinion, I think you should call her if you want to talk to her, and don't call her if you don't want anything to do with her at all. I don't think you should "make her chase you". People need to do what they really feel and not play ANY games. Or at least be 90% game free lol. Seriously, though. If you want to talk to her, then call. She said it was okay to call, so you're not invading her need for "space" clause. Have you thought about what you might say? You should think HARD about it before you have any talks with her. If you don't want anything to do with her, you can either call her and tell her that, or you can just leave the whole situation alone. The point is to act on how you feel, do what you mean, say what you mean, etc. Be REAL. Don't be fake.

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While I somewhat echo Bronze Babe, I think I would hold off and make sure that if you did call you would speak of entirely non-relationship related things. So, if you want to call to shoot the breeze, go for it... but let her bring up anything "serious". If you don't think you are strong enough to just chat yet, then don't do it. It's not all a game, some things are recommended to give you support to make sure you are doing the right things for you when you aren't necessarily thinking clearly about a situation.

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It's not all a game, some things are recommended to give you support to make sure you are doing the right things for you when you aren't necessarily thinking clearly about a situation.

 

 

Yes, this is true. If and when you call, you really have to make sure that you know what you want to say and that you're thinking rationally and not emotionally. Be logical. Make sense. Even if you are emotional, you have to make sure that you express yourself in a way that is clear and makes sense, etc. You must be put together. Otherwise you'll end up confusing both you and her.

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Ya, it's tuff for me to call her. I will break the no contact rule. I got stuff to say but I don't know what it will lead to. What can i say for a normal conversartion.... I feel like i can loose a chance to be back with her....If she wanted to talk, she can call me. I been chasing after her after our break up. But made things worse. I want her to call me... She needs her so called space! I hope she was rethinking about the break up.... I was doing fine for two weeks, no contact and ignore her...

 

Today now she was being all flirty with me and making sex jokes... Next time I see her will be our Christmas party, next week tuesday night..

 

I'm just confused...

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You're not going to loose the chance to be with her just by having normal conversation with her and avoiding the stressful topic for a while. I also don't think you have to follow by no contact "rules". Life doesn't come with a handbook. Go with the way you feel, without being desperate or clingy or over emotional. Keep it real.

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I know i'll get yellings, if i call her. Breaking the no contact rule, giving in to much.

I called tonight, she never anwser. So i left it like that... At least shows, that i'm around. Even though i never call her for about 2 weeks now, and she told me to call her.

I don't want to go in a panic mode, she never answer, when she will call... bla bla bla...

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I would not call personally. If she is not willing to call you, but says you can call her, and then doesn't pick up, it seems SHE is the one playing games. I have had limited experience, but the experience I do have is to just do NC until YOUR ready. There is no rules or regulations. People on ENA sometimes think too much into the whole NC thing. NC is for you and nobody else, there isnt any specifics. NC isn't for getting her back. NC is for mending your heart and getting your life back. People need to realize is once that happens the ex will most likely notice the fact you have moved on and the ball will be in their court so to speak. If she can't swallow her pride and call you then why would you want a girl like that anyways? Just make sure you are doing NC for yourself. If you feel ready to call her and talk then go right ahead, I do not know your state of mind right now, but just because your ignoring doesn't mean YOU are playing games. You shouldn't feel bad about it. Your doing it because at one time you cared for her alot, and now shes not there for you anymore so you need to care for yourself. If she thinks your playing games and being immature then so what? at least youll be moved on. Just putting in my 2 cents haha...

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Ya i agreed, NC for me anymore. If she calls or text, i wont answer. I already did my part, tried to call her and she agreed for me to call her whenever.... She didn't pick up or bother calling back..... I'll just keep on doing what i supposed to be doing...

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She called me back around noon, from last night. She called me from my working place...

 

She said this... On my voicemail...

 

"Hi its me, i figure you wouldn't anwser, because you'll probably think you got called in to work, but i think you called me last night, and i didn't have my phone around with me. But just wanted to see whats up, and have a good day... bye..."

 

She called from work, like i said. I did not call her back....

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Update...

 

She called me around 7ish pm...

 

I did not intend to call her back, after the voice mail.

 

We talked for like little over an hr, without realizing it. Way to over board!

 

Just normal conversations, life, work, her friends, my friends etc....

 

Did not talk about our relationship what so ever. She asked if i was going to our christmas party, and i said i dunno yet. But i am going, but just want to pop out of the blues.

 

I dunno what i did was right or wrong, by picking up her phone call. Basically 70% of our conversations, i was listening...

 

I broke the NC rule. But she said, sorry to call you or bother you. But i called you back, and say whats up....

 

To make things clear, my dad past away couple months ago, and she was with me the whole time! So that played a part of it, of my conversation.

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