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How do I re-build my self esteem?


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My self esteem is at an all time low these days. After everything with my ex, I just think about how unlovable I must be. I don't know how to fix that. I fake being confident when I am out but I don't feel like I am really worth it. My former boyfriend, the one before the current ex, tells me often that I deserve so much better and anyone would be lucky to be with me- but he's obviously pretty biased.

 

So I guess what I'm asking is how do you recover your lost self esteem after letting yourself be treated like crap?

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Remember, self esteem is determined by you. To gain your confidence, you must believe it. You can fake it till you make it. You must also start working on yourself. Improving yourself and placing yourself in a better situation. Sure, you feel bad now, but you can still improve.

 

Start by going to the gym. Pampering yourself. Knowing you deserve better and believe it. I still struggle with this and handling my emotions. But, today I feel okay. Not to the point of indifference, but just telling myself F it. What's done is done. The world is my playground.

 

Eventually my lies become reality.

 

=D

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Remember, self esteem is determined by you. To gain your confidence, you must believe it. You can fake it till you make it. You must also start working on yourself. Improving yourself and placing yourself in a better situation. Sure, you feel bad now, but you can still improve.

 

Start by going to the gym. Pampering yourself. Knowing you deserve better and believe it. I still struggle with this and handling my emotions. But, today I feel okay. Not to the point of indifference, but just telling myself F it. What's done is done. The world is my playground.

 

Eventually my lies become reality.

 

=D

 

Glad to see things are looking up for you, push.

 

Still here if you need to talk, buddy. I accept all PM's.

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After being treated like crap myself a little while back, I know how hard it can be to re-build self esteem. What helped me was realizing that I had experienced this very negative relationship and, whether it was her fault or mine that it went so badly is unimportant. What matters is that I learned what I want and don't want in the future. Now, I know what to look for and stay away from as I meet new women.

 

Also, feeling unworthy and not lovable is tough but remember that one person's opinion doesn't count for the whole world. Might your ex feel that you aren't worthy? Maybe but he doesn't speak for every guy on the planet.

 

We are all attracted to different traits and qualities. For instance, I'm quiet, laid back and attentive and that might cause me to be seen as completely wrong by one girl and perfectly right by another. However, for me to judge myself as worthless or uninteresting to all women based solely on a handful of opinions would be selling myself majorly short.

 

I know it can be hard at times but try to understand that you are exactly what someone is looking for, even if he hasn't found you yet.

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Let me give you real solution.

Tonight watch Rocky 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 as you download the soundtrack into your mp3 player.

wake up 5am the morning before sunrise, get out 3 raw eggs and just drink them up.

Put on your shoes, ur mp3 player on. Blast. "i will survive" "eye of the tiger", "final countdown", and the favorite Queens hits. and run. run. until you can't take it anymore. run until you hit the pavement and hit your head so hard that your tears flow into the storm drain. When your knees give up. Pump your fist into the air and scream "I am champion, I am better than this" and do some crazy shadow boxing as you are waiting for the lights to change. if the lights don't change fast enough do one handed push ups. as you scream NOPAIN NOGAIN. NO PAIN NO GAIN.

 

do that for 7 months straight everymorning and you can lost 25 pounds and have lots of self esteem that you can achieve anything that you put your mind into. You'll continue that even after you have fully healed and you'll have better life quality.

 

Message me if you need any help. Your destiny is in your hands.

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What about looking to see if there are any self-help books available that helps you through it? Most people are not book people, but it's worth a try.

 

Just go to your local bookstore and browse around the self-help section. You may find something of use there. Breath some fresh air, but please please don't drink any coffee there, otherwise you'll look like this

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What about looking to see if there are any self-help books available that helps you through it? Most people are not book people, but it's worth a try.

 

Just go to your local bookstore and browse around the self-help section. You may find something of use there. Breath some fresh air, but please please don't drink any coffee there, otherwise you'll look like this

 

 

Haha! Thanks. Maybe I should try them. I am a book person, just not the self-help books

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I think you have to find it in yourself to believe you are the greatest person in the world. You are always there for yourself, you are kind to yourself and you will never leave yourself. I tell myself everyday that I am amazing and no matter what that Ahole (the ex) has made me feel, I am still 100% sure that I can get along without him. Be proud of yourself for holding up. Walk with your head high and your smile wide. WORK OUT. I agree with every person who mentioned going to the gym on here that it works wonders. You will feel a million times better about yourself once you improve your health. It's not just about having a great body, but being HEALTHY, having energy, the extra endorphins and a stronger metabolism, who doesn't love that?

 

Julioiglesia's idea is hilarious and I'm pretty sure if I ever saw anyone doing that in public I would want to be their new best friend. Maybe we should all try it.

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