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How should I act?


tabbycat41
Your Boyfriend Left You - So What?
Your Boyfriend Left You - So What?

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as I posted before, my boyfriend broke up with me on Monday. We have had very light contact, with me on Wednesday asking if he had the money he owes me. He said he would on Thursday. he did not call on Thurs and I didn't call him, trying to make myself a little scarce. I texted him this morning and he called me back said he did not have the money yet, and we talked for a minute. I told him I needed to come get some things I had left at his house. He said that would be fine, then he said, "I love you." I paused for a minute, then awkwardly said it back, maybe a little sarcastically. knowing him and his personality, I'm pretty sure he's going to want to get back together when I see him later. I love him, but don't know if that would be the right choice. And I think he should work for it some even if I do. But I don't want to come off as I will never get back with him. I really need time to think. I don't want to just run back to him but I don't want to push him away completely. what should I say and do? How do I act?

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When my sister's bf broke up with her, he owed her money too so she took a couple valuable things of his as collateral. She would give them back when he paid them back. (one of the things she took was an ipod she had given him for Christmas, in case you were curious)

 

He never paid her back so I guess it was a fair trade. hint hint...

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I can't say I agree with taking things for collateral. For one, it's called theft. You can be arrested for this. Give the guy time to pay and if he doesn't, take him to small claims court. One thing I would suggest you might want to do right away, get him to sign a statement that he owes you $$ dollars and date it. Then, if you have to go to court you have proof he owes you money. One persons word against another never goes far in a judges eye.

 

How do you act when you see him? Smile, say hello, let him know what you're picking up. Maybe inquire when he'll be paying you. Try to be unaffected by the break-up. READ NO CRYING, BEGGING, OR POUTING. FOR GOD SAKES, NO X-SEX!!!

 

If he asks, say all is good and you have busy weekend planned and have a few things lined up next week. Be vague and give no details. Stick to your plan as to why your there. He'll more than likely pry... so let him know you're busy and have to run. It's all business baby.

 

Then you smile, say goodbye, and bail out. Leave him thinking about what he did and for him to wallow in his regret. He needs to understand your not pining over him and are happy with the prospect of moving on. Yeah... I know it hurts but suck it up.

 

They say curiosity killed the cat. Well a little bit of Mystery grilled it's furry a$$ and ate it with A1 Sauce.

 

My point is, keep his curiosity up, be mysterious, and keep him wanting more.

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I can't say I agree with taking things for collateral. For one, it's called theft. You can be arrested for this. Give the guy time to pay and if he doesn't, take him to small claims court. One thing I would suggest you might want to do right away, get him to sign a statement that he owes you $$ dollars and date it. Then, if you have to go to court you have proof he owes you money. One persons word against another never goes far in a judges eye.

 

You are right. It did seem kind of wrong that she would take his things, but at the same time, knowing her ex he never would have paid her back & he came out ahead in the end because he owed more than the collateral was worth. But they had a pretty bitter break-up, with him finding a new gf before ending his long-term relationship with my sis. That is probably a different situation.

 

That is a very good idea to have him sign a paper agreeing that he owes such amount of money. Maybe add a stipulation that he will pay with a check, that way he can't lie & say he paid her untraceable cash.

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You are right. It did seem kind of wrong that she would take his things, but at the same time, knowing her ex he never would have paid her back & he came out ahead in the end because he owed more than the collateral was worth. But they had a pretty bitter break-up, with him finding a new gf before ending his long-term relationship with my sis. That is probably a different situation.

 

That is a very good idea to have him sign a paper agreeing that he owes such amount of money. Maybe add a stipulation that he will pay with a check, that way he can't lie & say he paid her untraceable cash.

 

 

No sweat Alli, just don’t want to see you, her, or any ENA buddies getting into trouble.

 

It's just that if you take things against their wishes or without their authorization it's theft. He could have called the cops on your sister and had her arrested. When a bloody break-up is at hand you'd be surprised how vindictive people can get with one another.

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