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Inner conflict


allypally

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How to leave an abusive relationshi...
How to leave an abusive relationship and why it's so hard

I think I am heading towards the 'dark side' and do not know how to alleviate myself from this black mood.

 

I can't eat, can't sleep, my head is in a mess, my heart feels heavy. Can't stop crying.

 

SO angry at my bf - I just don't want to see him anymore. Would be so much easier if he would disappear from my life.

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Not to try and be funny but I watche Star Wars last night and it made me think of that when I saw the topic.

 

I know how you feel, there really is a 'dark side' of life when you pour yourself into feeling bad and concentrating on the negative.

 

What has your boyfriend done, maybe I can help?

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I remember I posted this

'I think hes acting like a jerk. Ignoring you. Disrespecting. Lying. Flirting in FRONT Of his future wife.

 

Do you really want to marry someone like that?

 

I'd get out and find someone who values me and doesnt have to look for something in other women to fufill his desire to flirt or whatever it is.'

 

I still mean that.

 

You really deserve SO much better. sounds like his looser tendancies are dragging you kicking and screaming over to the dark side.

 

So what are you going to do?

 

surely you know you'd be happier without him?

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I am in no mans land - should I stay or should I go?

 

Everything was going pretty well up until that point.

 

I know that relationships aren't perfect, am I overreacting? was it a simple case of a

GENUINE mistake??

 

Then my thoughts race to the seriousness of the situation, why would he WANT to do that?? has he lost his attraction for me?? was he trying to make me jealous??

 

CONFUSION, CONFUSION, ANXIETY, ANXIETY.

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I am like a stuck record - replaying the nightmares of that holiday - our first holiday.

 

All I want to do is get MYSELF past it.

 

If I feel this unhappy now with the man I was supposed to have married, then to turn around the situation would be the equivalent of a massive engineering project.

 

I wouldn't know where to begin and I'm not sure that I want to either.

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I am in denial - denial that he is an outrageous and unashamed flirt, a lad through and through who CANNOT resist eyeing up other women even when I am with him, and I am his 'trophy' gf. Why am I ALWAYS someone's trophy gf????!

 

I am obsessed with the taxi incident on our holiday - cannot get it out of my mind.

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BAG08 - how right you are!

 

I was thinking that yesterday - why am I making excuses for this guy? On Monday I said the words "I forgive you".

 

I don't want or need this kind of anxiety in my life. I don't want to have to watch my back whenever another woman walks into the room. Where are his eyes focused?? oh yes! on her! Oh no! another dinner table and I am being ignored while he chats up the woman who is flirting with him.

 

So he expects me to be his stay-at-home, caring wife while he goes off with the lads and gets it off with younger, available women???

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You shoudlnt get it out of your mind

 

You'd be saying 'Oh i'll let go of how i feel, just so i can stay with this man'

 

If your a trophy gf your clearly intelligent and pretty, so dont let yourself be a mans arm candy

 

Seriously im sure you wouldnt have problems finding someone else

 

We live life ONCE , wasting it on someone who wants to flirt with other women...not good

 

Have you talked to him? Has he tried hard not too for you?

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BAG08 - how right you are!

 

I was thinking that yesterday - why am I making excuses for this guy? On Monday I said the words "I forgive you".

 

I don't want or need this kind of anxiety in my life. I don't want to have to watch my back whenever another woman walks into the room. Where are his eyes focused?? oh yes! on her! Oh no! another dinner table and I am being ignored while he chats up the woman who is flirting with him.

 

So he expects me to be his stay-at-home, caring wife while he goes off with the lads and gets it off with younger, available women???

 

I'll tell you a story. My uncle, an average looking, wealthy man, always a ladies man. Gets with my Aunt, a gorgeous blonde whose incredibly smart, is a sucessful business woman. He is the same. checks out other women, flirts with them right in front of her, has had several affairs left her several times and she takes him back and makes excuses.

 

Im not saying it'd be the same.

 

But him ignoring you for other women and your not even married yet, not good.

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I get your point.

 

Why the HELL do they do it???

 

They have something great, treat it like s**t, while they go on the hunt for variety.

 

we aren't all idiots. i let an amazing woman go once. i was 22 though. young and dumb and had no idea who i was.

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You were 22 - thats understandable at that age - still learning and not much experience.

 

He is 36, had asked me to marry him, yet behaved as though he was single and on the pull!

 

What am i missing???

 

He wants the gorgeous trophy wife who cooks him dinner and sits at home whilst he can still enjoy flirting and the thrill of the chase.

 

What will you do?

 

You cant live a life lik ethat.

 

Ignorance? Pah, pathetic.

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He hasn't got a clue about women.

 

He is too influenced by his laddish friends who are quite frankly as immature as he is.

 

I have been advised to print off the wedding vows, give them to him, and pose the question whether or not he could honour them for the rest of his life.

 

I predict his answer will be 'yes' to get me off his back.

 

People don't change and as you say he has a LOT of growing up to do.

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