Jump to content

Realizing what the purpose of relationships are


Recommended Posts

Hi everyone,

Well, i'm here again after another failed relationship. My ex broke up with me 4 days ago and our friends have advised us to stay away from each other for a while. So we have complete no contact. We're both in a lot of pain right now and he keeps asking if I'm OK and I keep wondering if he's OK. We really care about each other and I know in my heart that we will remain friends afterwards.

The reason for the break up

Well, we were just different people and underdeveloped individuals. Also, we started our relationship knowing that it wouldn't last forever because I'm leaving to graduate school after I graduate. We also fought all the time on our differences. I was too controlling and he was too passive. We tried really hard to make it work but we ended up still fighting. I didn't have the strength to break up with him but I knew deep in my heart that it wouldn't work. He ended the relationship and made the decision. It was really hard not to blame myself completely but a friend of mine said it's not my fault and it's not his fault, it just wasn't meant to be. We were both human and we both made mistakes.

How I feel

I feel like I've learned from him and I'm starting to understand the aspect of relationships in life. I honestly never saw the point before. But it's to find out about ourselves and understand who we are as people. I know that in the previous relationship I had, I let my ex walk all over me and he cheated on me and treated me like crap. Now with this wonderful guy that I had the chance to share a relationship with, I was too controlling and aggressive because I guess I was afraid of being stepped on. Instead I ended up stepping on him. I felt so much regret but I realized that I can't change the past. I can only change myself now. And I feel like the change has begun and I'm learning from this.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup, but you seem to be handling it very well. I'm glad you've learned from your past relationship - that's what life is all about! Learning from our failings and our experiences. You seem very mature and I'm guessing you'll be fine in dealing with this because of your insight and depth. Go you!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi guys,

Thanks so much. You know, initially I was devastated and wanted him back. A friend of mine even suggested that she would speak with him and see if we could get together again. I spoke with another friend though who told me the truth about how he felt and that I needed to accept that it's over. It's tough but I'm trying to stay focused and not let my feelings for him get in the way of my healing. I honestly lost about 12 pounds within the past 3 days and I haven't been able to get a decent night's sleep. But I'm slowly forcing myself to eat. When I get back to campus, I plan on going to the gym every day and focusing on the bit of the semester that's left and during the winter break, I plan on studying for my GRE's and sending out my applications. I hope that by spring semester, we'll be able to talk and possibly be friends. There's no reason why we can't be strong enough to do so. I just know that I don't want to lose him as a friend. He's a great person.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...