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Boyfriend thinks I'm stalking him


Kiradoll

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He Calls Me Instead Of Texting
He Calls Me Instead Of Texting

Okay so the stupidest incident happened tonight. I was driving to my sister's house who lives around my boyfriend and its a really confusing neighbourhood (every house looks the same) so the way I find my sister's house is I go to my boyfriend's street and then follow the street there to my sister's. So tonight I was driving past my boyfriend's house and I thought I saw his dog running accross the street, so I turned around to see if it was his dog but I couldnt' find it anymore, so I just kept driving but then I started feeling bad and thinking what if something happens to it and I just left it? So I turned around again to look for it which meant I drove past my boyfriend's house a third time and this time I saw the dog but it was with a different owner so I was like 'okay good' and I just left and went to my sister's.

 

Then later tonight my boyfriend says he saw me drive past his house 3 times and that I was trying to look through his windows and spy on him. I'm like ' * * * !" I told him what I was really doing and he says he doesn't buy it. I'm like 'im sorry it looked like i was spying on you but i swear I wasnt and I'm offended you would think I would do that'

 

but he wont stop accusing me! * * * !

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He says that I probably freaked out cause I called him twice and he didnt answer prior to that and so I went to check up on him. But this is just all accusations that couldnt be farther from the truth! I feel so helpless in this situation its like no matter what I say he is convinced that I was stalking him, it's so frustrating.

 

He's like, 'it was so obvious you were trying to look through my window and you were driving super slow'

 

What?!?! That makes no sense. Maybe it looked that way cause I was looking around searching for his dog? And obviously I was driving slow! its in a neighbourhood and I was looking for his dog and I didnt wanna run it over! God, this is so frustrating.

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If it were me, and my partner said that he didn't buy it. I'd just laugh! I mean, its a funny situation. I can see how someone might think that it was them stalking, but I think you destroy this one with humour. Just giggle when he suggests you're stalking him. It's a hilarious story. It could quickly spin out of control if you take it seriously.

 

My two cents...

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No, this is seriously out of nowhere.

 

Well you have written quite a few threads that are either hinging on insecurity or a b/f who is feeling suffocated, or perhaps he isn't into this anymore. I feel they are all related. Either you are keeping too many tabs (hence all of those threads) or he just isn't really feeling this relationship.

 

Your prior threads are definitely a sign that this isn't out of nowhere. You two have had some problems with issues for a bit now, and i think that his feeling you are checking up on him is related to the other issues. I don't know if you are being too insecure, or he is being disrespectful, or a combo of both where each of you are feeding into each other.

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I agree Kira! Is this really worth being upset about? Your boyfriend seems to be really childish!

 

I do have to ask though! Did your boyfriend live there before your sister moved to the area?

 

Yeah, my sister just moved in a month ago and I'm still learning the area. I got a bit lost with the streets so I found myself by going to his street cause I've memorized his street number so I can find it in the maze of suburbia.

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Well you have written quite a few threads that are either hinging on insecurity or a b/f who is feeling suffocated, or perhaps he isn't into this anymore. I feel they are all related. Either you are keeping too many tabs (hence all of those threads) or he just isn't really feeling this relationship.

 

Your prior threads are definitely a sign that this isn't out of nowhere. You two have had some problems with issues for a bit now, and i think that his feeling you are checking up on him is related to the other issues. I don't know if you are being too insecure, or he is being disrespectful, or a combo of both where each of you are feeding into each other.

 

 

 

I agree....and let's be honest here.

 

If any of us looked out our window and saw our SO slowly drive by 3 times within a short timespan we would most likely come to the same conclusion as the bf did....

 

It's a reasonable conclusion even if it's not true...

 

 

twas a funny story though...try to laugh it off!!

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I agree....and let's be honest here.

 

If any of us looked out our window and saw our SO slowly drive by 3 times within a short timespan we would most likely come to the same conclusion as the bf did....

 

It's a reasonable conclusion even if it's not true...

 

 

twas a funny story though...try to laugh it off!!

 

But I think that ultimately you need to trust your SO when they tell you what they REALLY were doing. This just shows me that he doesn't trust me.

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But I think that ultimately you need to trust your SO when they tell you what they REALLY were doing. This just shows me that he doesn't trust me.

 

 

 

oh I agree, but I think it's understandable that he's having a hard time wrapping his brain around your story...

 

Months from now you two will be laughing at this...

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Not all situations need to be defused with serious discussions. Seriously, defuse this one with humour

 

yes, i agree!

 

accuse HIM of stalking you!!! afterall, he was the one sitting and staring out side of his window watching you drive by! i mean, who does that? i sure don't sit by my windows and watch traffic drive by? what is he, a cat?

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does he know that you pass his house in order to get to your sisters?

 

 

i can see it from his point of view, though, and it does seem sort of fishy.

 

but you made your case so i would just try to stay away from the topic... and maybe try to find another way to make it to your sisters from now on.

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Well it's not directly on my way but I always get lost when in that neighbourhood and I was coming from another city and I wasn't sure of the way, I took a wrong turn and corrected myself by finding his street because if I could find his house, then I could know where I was and find my way to my sister's from there. All these houses are like cookie cutter houses, it's so hard to find your way around.

 

Are you and the OP the same person???

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Well it's not directly on my way but I always get lost when in that neighbourhood and I was coming from another city and I wasn't sure of the way, I took a wrong turn and corrected myself by finding his street because if I could find his house, then I could know where I was and find my way to my sister's from there. All these houses are like cookie cutter houses, it's so hard to find your way around.

i understand. i'm not knocking the method. but i think you should invest in a GPS before you're boyfriend goes crazy. some people get paranoid.

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I don't think you should stress it too much. You already explained to him that you weren't stalking him, so you can't really do much else but prove to him that you're not a "stalker". Just be a little more conscious from now on of what you do, & make sure you don't do anything that reaffirms his thoughts.

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