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Okay,I tried to kill myself and I failed.Now I am in hospital.I am thinking to kill myself after I get out,and this time I wont fail.

But I dont think I really want to die.It's strange that I am more happy then upset that I survived.

So let's recap.Why shouldnt I kill myself?I know that I probably have heard or imagine them,but maybe I will find a reason to live,cuz I can't se one.

I know that nothing will change,and i know I cant live like this.But then again,maybe I will change.As I said before,I know that I will nwvwr have sex/girlfriend,but I got used to that.Here I am referring that I am very shy and I cant comunicate with others(boys included).

Anyway,I stated my probs in other threads(although they are deleted now,since I have this bad habbit).

Yup,I am devieting from the subject.Might be because of the Disturbed-The night song that is yelling in my ears(strong headsets

 

So...er...you know,I dont really know what else to say.I hope that's enough.

Alexandru out

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You're still young. I was 20 when I got into my first serious relationship.

When I was 17, I was depressed all the time. I felt like I didn't really get along with people my age. In fact, most people my age annoyed me.

I looked down on 'happy' people. I felt that they were shallow and had not really looked deeper into life.

 

And then one day I realized that I liked being depressed. I wallowed in self-pity all the time and I never tried to get better. I realized that happiness is a choice and I wasn't going to let something like life keep me down. I didn't get better right away, but things really started changing for me at that point. I started finding things to do that I enjoyed and I started hanging out with my cousin who I always got along with. I was 19 at that time so people my age didn't act as 'stupid' as I used to think they did.

 

Believe me, it gets better.

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Don't kill yourself.. there's no point.. how old are you??? 17 years old?? You have SO much living left to do... You're wasting a wonderful thing! I wish I was .... 21 again... well 19 would be cool.. I'm sure I could some hot chick to buy me cheladas...

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I think you posted this before and we were all concern about you. Now you're in a hospital and still think about killing yourself, just think how would your family or closed friends will react to this. If you end up doing it, everyone who loves you will grieve for life. Don't you wanna know what it's like having a g/f, get marry and/or have a career, or have kids if possible. If you kill yourself you never know what you could have done in the future.

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Stop it Regenesis!!!I am miles away from you , have never known you, yet when i read your post, it makes me wanna reach out..i say 'I love you' & i mean it, whether or not you believe it..& i am damn confident there are others who feel the same way, who want to be there for you, do everything for you, just to see u smile.

 

You are here for a purpose Regenesis.Don't pull on the strands of life like a game when it's not one.

 

I know you'll come out - i have faith.You can have anything you set out for.

 

Love..

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I didn't have sex or a serious girlfriend until I was 23 and I had some of the same issues that you have. One thing I've also realized after a few relationships is that they are not the pinnacle of existence. In fact, they are far from it. Yes they can be an added bonus, but the real happiness is from what you create yourself. No one else can do it.

 

My suggestion is to find those things that you are really passionate about and follow them and make them your focus, instead of the things that you don't have.

 

There are a lot of people that have the relationship and the career, but because they didn't follow their passion - are not truly fullfilled or happy.

 

I have no other advice to give but that.

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