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Eye Contact and shyness


enchanted771

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So, yesterday I was at the gym and was on this machine. Well, this cute guy was passing by and I kind of looked at him and he looked back. About 5 minutes later, I was going down the stairs and he was coming up. Well, I should have made the best of the situation but I didnt. I could barely look at him. I am newly single and am still healing from my breakup so maybe that is why. My boyfriend had made me feel so secure in the beginning of the relationship, and once he had me hooked he backed off. I think this is part of the reason I felt so insecure for the last month. When someone wont talk to you, then you kind of feel insecure.

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if you see him again at the gym, make a point to talk to him, where ists not a "Hi, do you come here often?" (when you see him all the time.. lol!)

 

If he is doing a set on a machine, why not ask him if you can work in with him for a set?

 

Yikes! lol. This is part of my shyness problem lol. I was on the ET machine and he was walking by. I thought maybe he was looking at the girl next to me so I thought nothing of it. that is, until I came down the stairs and saw him looking at me! I should have asked him for the time LOL. I know its kind of cheesy, but I gotta get my confidence back.

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Yikes! lol. This is part of my shyness problem lol. I was on the ET machine and he was walking by. I thought maybe he was looking at the girl next to me so I thought nothing of it. that is, until I came down the stairs and saw him looking at me! I should have asked him for the time LOL. I know its kind of cheesy, but I gotta get my confidence back.

 

I'm sure you will! And, since you see him at the gym, and he goes too, he knows that you will have at least one thing in common.

 

Go for it!

 

Here's what you could say,

 

"How much longer do you have on that machine"

 

"Do yo mind if I work in with you"

 

(If he is working out near some dumbells that you could use)

"Are you using these? Do you know if anyone else is?"

 

(If he is at any machine that you want to use)

Do you mind if i work in with you?"

 

 

Good luck!

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Yikes! lol. This is part of my shyness problem lol. I was on the ET machine and he was walking by. I thought maybe he was looking at the girl next to me so I thought nothing of it. that is, until I came down the stairs and saw him looking at me! I should have asked him for the time LOL. I know its kind of cheesy, but I gotta get my confidence back.

 

I think making small talk and other introductions are difficult for a good number of people. i found this recently that you might find useful - link removed

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I think making small talk and other introductions are difficult for a good number of people. i found this recently that you might find useful - link removed

 

Thanks, I can use all the help I can get! =) I have no idea why I am no self-conscious, I know that i am pretty but still...

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As an avid gym goer, I would shy away from asking to work in, asking for a spot or something to that degree. Most people that are serious about working out and not going through the motions often don't like to be bothered, especially while doing the work part of it. The reason I say this is think about it there are large differences in strength between the opposite sexes. So if you were to work in this would involve taking plates off/on, and swapping towels on the bench(if you're considerate) and the chance that they don't want to be bothered by anyone. Take the IPOD challenge, if they are rocking out chances are they don't want to be bothered by anyone.

 

 

However if you have a notion that you may both be intrested in each other it's perfectly fine to bother them politely. I am just saying for complete strangers that doesn't work.

 

 

However being direct has worked for me and telling a certain girl I thought they were cute and if they would like to get a bite to eat sometime when they aren't working out obviously has gotten me more dates than asking to work in, etc. etc., has gotten. Then from there you have something to talk about and you could definitely bring on the idea of working out together then you can go from there. Also you can do a I choose a workout, you choose a workout thing. Then you can get an opportunity to teach each other moves you may not know. For instance I tought my girlfriend some powerlifting stuff and she tought me some girly moves. You both get something out of it and opens a lot to talk about.

 

I do apologize if I sound harsh. Of course this is just my .02 and everyone reacts differently to a given situation but most don't like being approached while working out.

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I have the same problem when it comes to making eye contact and letting a guy know I'm "interested". It's so awkward, and I get really embarrassed when the guy is really attractive or "my type" so to speak.

 

Don't feel bad I think a lot of women feel like this!! Maybe you can try to break out of your comfort zone by saying a quick hello next time. At least you're able to maintain eye contact.

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