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I need change... my life is a mess... help


monkey123
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I dont know what is wrong with me right now. Im 19 years old, i live with my parents and go to community college. Last year i was an honor roll student with a 3.25 GPA and put little effort into it. This year i am putting no effort into school... literally none... nothing... i have probably done like 3 homework assignments all year. I still will probably get decent grades and pass just because im not really stupid, but i know its a bad habit that if i keep up im going to fail eventually down the road. I just dont care... i know its important... but i would rather just sit here and do nothing.

 

My energy is extremely low latley, i am always tired and have been extremely lazy. I feel like i can sleep for days if i just had the chance to lay there for that long. I put no effort into anything really, I am in a band right now, I am the lead guitarist and I have natural talent for the insturment, but i just dont put in the time. I know i can be great, people tell me that some people just got it and that im one of them, if i just deticate the time i can make some great music but I just will pick it up, play for about 10 minutes then get bored of it and try to find something else to do. I havent worked out in a long time, i am naturally not weak, i am 6'1 170 and i have muscle, i can get a nice body, i already have a decent one, but once again i just dont put in the effort. My drive to work hard has compeletely gone away. At my old job they said they loved me and that I was the best worker they had, but i just lost that drive. I still work hard but its just not the same... i dont have a smile on my face doing it thats for sure.

 

I feel like im always sick, i havent felt 100% healthy since i graduated high school. I have been getting discusting mucus build up in the back of my throat and i dont know how to get rid of it. I smoke ciggerettes when im drinking which is only on the weekends but i have never bought a pack for myself. I smoke weed every once in a while but i know that is not going to help me at all so i destroyed my pipe about 2 weeks ago and havent smoked since. I still dont feel healthy though, i dont know what it is... i just dont feel healthy. I think its all mental but sometimes i feel like if i went to the doctors and had a full check up on me, i wouldnt be surprised if i had some illness. Something isnt right with me right now...

 

I feel depressed maybe a couple times a week, right now i kind of do, but my life is just so boring and it isnt getting better. I dont know how to fix it, my rooms a mess, my car is a mess and i hate being a mess... my whole life is a mess... i want to change it. I feel like living at my house with my parents is terrible for me also because it allowes me to be lazy.

 

I want all these things to be good, I want to be healthy, I want to work out, I want to pursue my guitar playing and take it to a whole other level and I want to be doing good in school. I just cant seem to change, my mind is not set on changing and I have no idea on how to go about changing it. My life needs to change...

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Sounds partially like you are bored and need to shake up your routine a bit. Losing interest in things you like isn't that uncommon, and it doesn't necessarily mean depression. I go through phases like that in my life and almost inevitably I find that I just want change.

 

If you were depressed, you wouldn't care. Try asking yourself a question periodically through the day, and be honest with your answer no matter how illogical or silly it might seem: What do I really want to be doing right now? If I felt no pressure or obligations, if I had no routine, what would I do?

 

Don't be surprised if it's something totally silly and meaningless at first, like "sleeping" or "watching tv" or whatever. That's ok. You have to get comfortable with being honest with yourself and listening to yourself before you get to the real answers.

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I'm having the SAME issues. I'm 20 & doing pretty bad in my college classes & with my finances for a lack of wanting to get up & do anything. Its really bugging me, too! I'm messier than ever...lazier than ever...& can't seem to light a fire under my ass.

 

I finally got fed up though & called my dad & came clean about the damage my laziness has done & he gave me some good advice that I've been following & its really helping. Its tough...but it helps.

 

1.Whenever ur brain says "I don't want to do this" do that thing immediately & do ur best! Don't succumb to the laziness anymore.

2.For the messiness, I started paying attention to everything I was leaving around & dropping & immediately throwing things away or putting them n their place

3.The more u sit...the harder it is to get up. So, wake up & go do something & eventually u will feel great because u did a lot of things in one day!

 

I hope this helps!

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