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Ok folks, NC begins and I need encouragement


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Hi everyone and thanks in advance for all the great advice and encouragement. This site has really been a life saver for me. Background, we broke up 8 months ago after she cheated for 3 months. She dumped me and moved out of our apartment. We were together for 8, almost 9 years. NC on and off the whole time with me emailing her once every month or so and her emailing me 3-4 times as well. We have only seen each other once since March. I am moving forward with life but still miss her a lot. She has moved in with the guy that she cheated on me with and appears quite happy from the little bits of info that I hear.

I have finally come to the realization that the only way to truly move on is to go complete NC. I begin this today and will continue it indefinitely. Please tell me it is the best and fastest way to recover and that it will get easier in time. Not contacting her will be hard but I am tired of chasing after someone who doesn't give a crap about me. It makes no sense. Should I block her email and phone numbers ? Any and all advice to make it easier would be great.

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hey fleck,

 

i was with my ex for just about 8 years too. we broke up for different reasons, but nc really helped me.

 

one thing you need to remember is healing is not a static process. there will be days when you feel great and days you feel the urge to break the silence. do whatever you have to do, but don't give into those urges.

 

remember, you deserve some who treats you and your relationship with respect.

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I am sorry you had to go through that. I recently caught my girlfriend of 3 years with another guy and it has destroyed me. NC is very hard. It has only been 3 weeks but I have these strong urges to contact her that I have to fight. I almost drove by her house on the way to work today just to see if she was there? It makes not sense, she cheated and is with someone else. We should move on. Love is not a switch though. Its something that grows and will is something that will take time to fade. I have every right to hate her but I just can't switch like that. I pray for you and no that you are not alone. I will check back when it gets tough read other posts and keep fighting. You deserve someone who would not do that to you.

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I'm so sorry you went through that. MY GF broke up with me almost 7 weeks ago, and we kept in touch on and off and saw each other a few times as well. It was the worst mistake of my life, had I stuck to NC, she would not have led me on for a month only to say she was happier with someone else than with me. Another month of false hope would have been avoided had I just stayed away, well now I am, and let it kill her....

 

Hang in there, and stick to NC, it's the best and only way!

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I'm so sorry you went through that. MY GF broke up with me almost 7 weeks ago, and we kept in touch on and off and saw each other a few times as well. It was the worst mistake of my life, had I stuck to NC, she would not have led me on for a month only to say she was happier with someone else than with me. Another month of false hope would have been avoided had I just stayed away, well now I am, and let it kill her....

 

Hang in there, and stick to NC, it's the best and only way!

 

Hi, and thanks for the kind words. You are so right about hanging around too long. I wish I could roll back the clock to the night I found out about the cheating. I would never talk to her again and I would have been well on my way to walking this off. Instead , like a wuss I hung around for her scrapes of attention and emails or calls. As I said above it has been too long already and I am long overdue for full on NC.

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