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Is the worst over?


confused_255

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I feel like i've gone almost completely numb, i have had a low amount of contact with her in the past week, its been over a month now since we broke up, and i feel like im getting better, although i am not completely sure, after someone hurts me i put a wall up and thats what has happened, i don't know what i feel now, i feel like im over her, but thoughts of her keep reoccurring in my mind, although they don't bother me anymore because i won't allow them to get to me.

 

i feel more angry towards her everyday, is it almost over? are there stages in this? can anyone help me? i dont know what to do, i know i still love her but its like i have gone completely numb and i cant feel any emotions... is the worst over? there has been 1 really hard day and thats when i looked out my window and saw couples walking by my house.. i wanted to die

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There are stages, I think they're the same as the grieving stages.

 

Let's see if I can remember:

 

Denial and Isolation

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Acceptance

 

Personally, I'm still jumping around in there. Maybe some other folks who've come out the other side can comment.

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Sorry to hear about your suffering. I do understand and sympathise.

 

Well it's been 6 weeks for me now and I probably feel the same as you do right now and can thereforee relate to how you're feeling.

 

I wouldn't recommend remaining in contact, it will only prolong the pain even more. Time to sever contact.

 

The key is to keep busy and focus solely on YOU. I know it's easier said than done, but you have to force yourself occasionally! It's normal to be looking at other couples etc, don't knock yourself about though, just look away when you see things like this!

 

I've been having a number of good days and bad and I thought I was over the worst but alas tonight I started going downhill again. It's a bit of a rollercoaster that you're forced to ride out.

 

If you're at the anger stage that is GOOD news. You're moving on. There are indeed 'stages' you need to go though and the reality I think is it will take you many months to heal and get to the finish line. It's nice when you get there, but you have a mountain to climb. You just need to keep on climbing and don't look back. How long were you together?

 

I was with my ex for 2 years and I suspect it'll take me 6 months of hard work to repair the damage she's caused. Then I suspect she'll make contact and the wounds will be re-opened.

 

There is plenty of support in here so feel free to post (and PM) where you need to. I'm going through the same crap (and there are MANY others in here too). It's comforting to know you're not alone.

 

Hopefully tomorrow I'll start feeling better again, the mornings are the worst I have to admit. My experience says you'll be looking at 3 months at least to get through the 'stages'. I don't cope with rejection too well and from the last long term relationship it was 6 months from memory before I felt I was back to my old self.

 

Hang in there and share the pain with others.

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