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I don't want to get another job, I'm afraid.


CoCo2009

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I was laid off on October 3rd and I have unemployment. Its not enough to pay all the bills so I have to get another job. I am afraid to start really looking hard because when I find one I won't know anyone there and I will feel stupid. I am very shy and have anxiety and always end up looking or feeling stupid. I'm also afraid that when I get a job I will hate it and start to dread waking up in the morning. Since I have been off of work for the past few weeks I feel like I am much happier... this sucks. I hate life so much.

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sorry to hear u where laid off.

 

i recently started a new job.

i think usually all jobs are going to be akward at first, but just try and remind yourself that you are equal to them (even if they have been there longer).

i was so shy before. but i just began by being friendly. not much chit chat (thank god our office doesnt allow for much of that) but i would just say "hi"/"good morning".

now i have been there a week and the girls have kind of warmed up to me a bit which is nice.

 

i dunno if it helps, but try to look at the new job more positively. it will mean more money for you plus maybe potential new friends/aquaintances.

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My friend had a bad job, and then got fired from her next. But she found another job, and you will too.Its easy to be nervous after you get laid off, etc, but you just have to find the strength within yourself to do it. I got fired as a teenager from a part time job I really loved, then got fired some months later from another job(I'm not hoplessly incompetent, just bad luck)- and have just been in school since, never worked (I'm 22)- I looked for summer jobs a bit through the past few from time to time, but I've never gotten one.. I'm too nervous to really try, and its been four years, so I'm there with you.Lots of people are. But you can do it- I haven't been reading all of your recent posts, but if you have someone supportive to know you are afraid and be there for you, that often helps.

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I left my job in august of last year and started temping in the november. Walking into a new place of work after being in my previous position for about 7 years (before, during and and after university) was one of the scariest things I have ever done. I am massively shy and socially anxious, but it was ok.

 

And because of that one of the best. I know I can walk into a job, knowing no one and not being sure what I'm doing and it will be ok. You learn the job - everyone expects you to make a mistake and will help you if you ask, and people are for the most part, as friendly as you are. So as long as you are polite and smile, you'll get the same back.

 

Look on it as an opportunity to gain skills, meet people and work on yourself.

 

That said, I am starting a new job next monday after having a couple of months out of work and I really don't want to go! I've really relaxed and got into not having to get up early, and doing what I want of a day. Not working is lovely, but not as lovely as a pay packet unfortunately, that's definitely better.

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It can be a bit scary walking into any new situation where you don't know anyone, but the more you do it the easier it will become for you. Look at it this way, you could end up meeting some really great people and gain some useful work experience at a new job.

 

Co-workers are generally very helpful when someone is new at a job, just be friendly and don't be afraid to ask questions. Good luck with your search!

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Try being a substitute teacher, which is one of my jobs. Everyday I work I go into a situation where I know absolutely no one. I like this as it allows me to work on my people skills. I take it as a challenge to make everyone in the room love me, and it often works. I have made so many friends and contacts this way. I guess it would be hard for some people, but it gets easier the more often you do it. Just relax and charm the pants off of everyone!

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I was laid off on October 3rd and I have unemployment. Its not enough to pay all the bills so I have to get another job. I am afraid to start really looking hard because when I find one I won't know anyone there and I will feel stupid. I am very shy and have anxiety and always end up looking or feeling stupid. I'm also afraid that when I get a job I will hate it and start to dread waking up in the morning. Since I have been off of work for the past few weeks I feel like I am much happier... this sucks. I hate life so much.

 

I just wanna say, I totally feel exactly what you're going through right now!!

 

It's totally common after you lose a job, you grow into this comfy blanket space (maybe a week or two afterwerds) where you feel you're almost on a sabbatical, with a little time to fall back on, but eventually responsibility knocks and you have to push yourself out -and back into the world.

 

I'm gonna be starting a cashier job possibly this weekend, or Monday, and I don't know jack about being a cashier, but what creeps me out the most is that I haven't worked a real job like this since probably 2003 due to college and mooching, lol! It's scary as hell to get back into the world, but not as bad as we think!

 

What you have to do right now is build your confidence, connect with people (people you know, people you've known), and socialize about your situation, and don't be ashamed of it, everybody is going through these same motions right now, everywhere, all over the entire world!

 

Build upon the fact that you did have a job, remember how you got that job, and how good it felt being able to pay those bills. You have to take baby steps, remember that finding a job to apply for is the easiest part, reeling it in is the difficult part.

 

So focus on the easy part for now, get your resume, barings, and emotions in check. Practice communicating with yourself in the mirror so you feel more socially prepared, smile a ton! Get physically active (meditate, jog). For the art of being comfortable around others is measured by how comfortable you really are with yourself! : ) -Oh and keep your mind positive, wrestle every negative thought you get, and say to yourself "I CAN DO IT, DAMNIT!" -You gotta convince your mind to get up and going!

 

Most importantly though, remember that it's just a job! It doesn't control you, it doesn't tell you how to live your future (unless you allow it to, or make a career off of it), it's just a stupid thing we all have to do so that we may reach the things that count within our lives, like our goals, aspirations, and hopes. As long as you keep your personal direction (in life) in full swing, the thought of work will eventually become routine for you, other than fearful.

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  • 2 months later...

:sad: I have a similar problem with a job..I moved up here from another state, left behind a job, security to be with my fiance. He's a doctor and makes decent money in these times, and I have been going to floral school and working temp jobs, but recently got a job at a retail store. I was stupid and gave open availability, and guess what? They have me working EXACT opposite hours of my fiance! Which defeats the whole purpose of moving here to be with him..I've worked 2 days and HATE the job already, my immediate boss is horrid...she's one of those "You don't do anything until I tell you to" kind of people, and although I am very easy going, I have taken an extreme dislike to her and they refuse to let me change my hours. I'm so disappointed..I think I'm going to quit..regardless of how hard it it to find a job..I am absolutely totally dreading going in to work again..It sucks!

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