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Getting back techinques--do they work?

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Well I've already posted about my situation with my boyfriend, in other posts. I actually posted this thread in the breaking up forum, but I didn't really get replies.

I'm not really sure if we broke up or not. After I confessed to him what I did, and he started to get a bit hysterical, I couldn't face him, so I asked him if he wanted me to leave and he replied "yes". It wasn't an official break up. In the past, when we broke up he made it clear that I was never to come over, call etc, and that he just can't do it anymore. This time I'm not sure what it was, but in my mind I've already assumed that our relationship was over just by the nature of what I did.

At first I was going to be persistent and prove my undying love for him, and how wrong I was, by going to his place constantly and begging him to talk to me. But then it dawned on me that this may push him further away, and make him hate my even more. I don't know if constantly trying to talk will really help the situation.

Yesterday I dropped off a care-package and I wrote a letter telling him that I took responsibility for what I did, that I was lost and scared at that time, never meant to hurt him, that I knew I made some mistakes in the relationship and that I wish I wish have been mature and I closed the letter off by saying that I hope he meets a woman that treats him right, but that I'd still try to fight to get him back.

But by fighting I'm just going to give him space. I've been reading online that the best way to get an ex back is by using counter-intuitive approaches to get them to want you. Basically not calling or texting. Getting your life back on track and then after 30 days make small and brief contact....


I'm not sure if this will work in my case since the situation is fragile.

My question is do these counter-intuitive techniques actually work for every break up situation or is it a scam.

I'm still not sure what I can really do to remedy the situation.


More information is:


Post number 34

Basically I had a secret abortion. Kept it from him, for two years... He found out that I had the abortion a week and a half ago, from his cousin. We've been together five years. The first two years were rocky. I lied a lot, and so that is why we broke up before as well. I know it's me that's the issue... I just want to make it work...

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Well he had turned his phone off for the last week and a half(since he found out what happened) but yesterdy it looks like he turned his phone back on. I called private so that he wouldn't know it was me... I won't call again, but I wonder why he turned his phone back on... Usually in the past he avoided me, he would keep it off until he called me to make ammends.. I'm wondering if I should reach out, or just give it time.

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didn't you post this already


well I'm going to give you the same reply



there are no such things as getting back techniques


nothing that is 100% proof that will always work to get your ex back


the only thing you can do is better yourself and learn from your mistakes


the only way you can get your ex back,is if they want you back


its harsh but true


try to move on,I know its hard


and seem like is impossible,but once you cut them out of your life


and start focusing on you,and taking the advantage of your time being alone,you will hurt for many more days if you don't

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Either they come back or they don't.


There are no tricks except (from my experience) that you should go NC, work hard on healing, figuring out what exactly went wrong and how you are to fix it for future relationships, and let go of them.


If you are to get back together, make sure all issues are worked out. Or else you're right where you left off....not happy.

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