LBP Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Suggestion: I think that most romance should be accomplished outside the boudoir. By this I mean there should be a sexual undercurrent clearly established before you set foot in her/your place. A kiss would be perfect and preferable. Find something romantic in the world around you and use that as a trampoline into intimacy - and don't be afraid to plan in advance. Full moon? Bingo. Backdrop of city lights? Money. River? Etc. There are eight million and one reasons for a girl to feel romantic, but most of them exist OUTSIDE of the bedroom. If you've kissed her before you get back, I guarantee you'll kiss her again before you leave! Recap: Conversation. Social intimacy. Locate romantic setting. Utilize. Eye contact. Kiss. Disco. Link to comment
Dating Coach Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Well, you're only 19 so there is a time to learn (a little bit of patronizing at the beginning) With today's girls, you must take more aggressive route - I'll tell you how my date yesterday went: we went bowling and I touched her few times and she touched me. After bowling we sat for drinks (not at the table...at some couch in the bar). 10 minutes later, my hand was on her knee. Result? She woke up in my bed this morning ;-). I was a perfect gentleman...just an aggressive one. If she stopped me at anything, that would be it - that is what being a gentleman is all about. P. Pegasus, am I wrong or do I recall giving you advice way back in the day? If so, congrats on really changing your life. If I am mistaking you for someone else... well still congrats! Link to comment
Pegasus Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Pegasus, am I wrong or do I recall giving you advice way back in the day? If so, congrats on really changing your life. If I am mistaking you for someone else... well still congrats! Yup, that's me. The only problem is that I had to learn it on my own so advices didn't help But I'm happy with results. Thanks for congrats P. Link to comment
Dating Coach Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Everyone has to learn it on their own, but sometimes all it takes is a fresh perspective to take that first step. I am not saying that I gave that to you, just saying that everyone has to do it on their own but that it's sometimes very difficult and requires someone else to show them that what they are trying isn't working. Link to comment
Ammy Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 It must just be the type of girls you're going on dates with... The first date and they are not interested because you didn't make a move?! Seriously... The two guys I have liked the most were a little nervous with me, and they only eventually went for the kiss towards the end of the 1st date / 2nd date... As long as they ask me out again I know they're interested, I don't need a kiss / moves to know that. I would say maybe give them a cuddle / kiss if you're comfortable and feel things are going well.. but if they are not interested because you're a gentleman then you're targetting the wrong girls - that is if you want a proper relationship. Ammy Link to comment
grymoire Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Well, you're only 19 so there is a time to learn (a little bit of patronizing at the beginning) With today's girls, you must take more aggressive route - I'll tell you how my date yesterday went: we went bowling and I touched her few times and she touched me. After bowling we sat for drinks (not at the table...at some couch in the bar). 10 minutes later, my hand was on her knee. Result? She woke up in my bed this morning ;-). I was a perfect gentleman...just an aggressive one. If she stopped me at anything, that would be it - that is what being a gentleman is all about. P. you are the MAN Link to comment
lumu Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I would and have invited a guy to my room to lay on my bed and watch movies as a friend Link to comment
Carmine Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 I would and have invited a guy to my room to lay on my bed and watch movies as a friend But after an unofficial DATE where me and her get lunch, go for a walk, etc? It wasn't like she said, "Hey, come HANG OUT and watch a movie with me." Link to comment
madmarten Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 I would and have invited a guy to my room to lay on my bed and watch movies as a friend This is why you have to make a move. Ultimately you may never know how girl really feels until you do. You may get rebuffed, or she pull you in closer...never know until you try Link to comment
Pegasus Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 But after an unofficial DATE where me and her get lunch, go for a walk, etc? It wasn't like she said, "Hey, come HANG OUT and watch a movie with me." Carmine, you failed on aggressiveness. There is no girl in the world that would resent you for trying - in the end you're "just a guy". Most full-proof is to try. Link to comment
Carmine Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 Carmine, you failed on aggressiveness. There is no girl in the world that would resent you for trying - in the end you're "just a guy". Most full-proof is to try. I know, I was just responding to the last poster that suggested it could've been a just friends situation. To a few girls I made a mistake and now I'm "just a guy." That ain't gonna happen again. Either I'm THAT guy or I'm a total creep to the girl. Link to comment
grymoire Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 On a separate note, I am just completely surprised by Carmine's posts lately. It sounds very different from his earlier ones. I still remember whenever I posted about "nice guy" thing he posted some amazing replies... Some very valuable ones.. I had an image of him as being very successful with women.. Now these posts are taking me by surprise. Link to comment
lumu Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Carmine, you failed on aggressiveness. There is no girl in the world that would resent you for trying - in the end you're "just a guy". Most full-proof is to try. Just don't look down on her if she is receptive. Just because she wants you doesn't mean she's done this with every guy or even any other guy. Link to comment
Carmine Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 On a separate note, I am just completely surprised by Carmine's posts lately. It sounds very different from his earlier ones. I still remember whenever I posted about "nice guy" thing he posted some amazing replies... Some very valuable ones.. I had an image of him as being very successful with women.. Now these posts are taking me by surprise. You didn't see my own threads then. I know a lot, but raw knowledge isn't everything. Learning how to use it is what counts, and that's an area that I'm still relatively lost in. Just don't look down on her if she is receptive. Just because she wants you doesn't mean she's done this with every guy or even any other guy. Not really sure what you mean by this. Why would I look down on her if she let me kiss her? Link to comment
lumu Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 You didn't see my own threads then. I know a lot, but raw knowledge isn't everything. Learning how to use it is what counts, and that's an area that I'm still relatively lost in. Not really sure what you mean by this. Why would I look down on her if she let me kiss her? No I mean you would look down on her if she went further then kissing. She may really like you or even love you and want to have sex with you. That is a possibility too. Chemistry even with good girls is a very strong pull. Nothing wrong with Kissing the girl. Every girl likes to be kissed. Maybe not pawed at like an animal at first but a strong kiss and knowing that you want her would be okay Link to comment
Carmine Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 No I mean you would look down on her if she went further then kissing. She may really like you or even love you and want to have sex with you. That is a possibility too. Chemistry even with good girls is a very strong pull. Nothing wrong with Kissing the girl. Every girl likes to be kissed. Maybe not pawed at like an animal at first but a strong kiss and knowing that you want her would be okay No no, I wouldn't look down on her at all. You have to understand that this is new to me...the concept that women actually LIKE sex and like being kissed, especially the idea that she might be thinking, "I really hope he kisses me..." I always thought women were cold in that respect...that they like being with a guy and having him hooked but they try as hard as possible to not get intimate with him. I'm still having doubts about whether a girl could actually desire me for me, just because I was told otherwise for so long. Link to comment
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