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Just turned 28 and don't know what to do with my life!!!


Skyfae

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So yes...I just turned 28 and I have no idea what I want to do with my life anymore.

 

Everything I thought I wanted has not happened.

 

I feel I am getting too old to not have it figured out.

 

I was once engaged to a man I was with for almost 8 years. At one time I was thrilled at the prospect of marrying, but now I find it terrifies me. While many other women my age are freaking out about not being married and having children, I'm running the opposite direction.

 

I have a BA degree in English and after numerous attempts to break into publishing, I'm stuck being a nanny.

 

I get very depressed at times and wonder what's wrong with me. I'm not really happy with the direction my life is going and what's more upsetting is I'm not even sure where I want it to go anymore.

 

I have other options, such as teaching english overseas. I just feel like life is passing me by, and I don't know why it's so hard for me to make a decision.

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You sound a little like me, not that long ago I was a bit pre-occupied with knowing where my life was going. I had a degree and followed that into a related professional occupation. I later referred to this lifestyle as 'on the path'... I had my life all planned out like a one-way path and I could only think of one way to go, to develop my chosen career, earn more money and become a settled adult with a mortgage and a family.

 

But I got off the path, I didn't like how structured it all was, also I thought, what was the point of stressing out over having a professional career and earning money if I didn't need the money to support a family. So I quit my job and have decided to let my life go in whichever direction best suits me rather than try and force it down one direction.

 

At the moment I'm looking for an undemanding day-job that gives me time to concentrate on my true calling; photography. One day I may become a professional photographer... I'm just happy that now I'm off the path I have a bit of control over my life and I'm not so preoccupied about what's ahead of me on the path, I can stop and enjoy being in my twenties instead.

 

You shouldn't worry about where you think you should be, why 'move on' when you should be enjoying being young. It's still up to you what you do with your life. Being a nanny at the moment may leave you with enough time to spend developing a career that you enjoy.

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I feel like that sometimes too. A year & a half after I was supposed to graduate & I still don't know what I want to do. The time goes by so fast. You just realized what you're doing now didn't work out & you need to make a change.

 

Maybe what you need is a bold move. Join the Peace Corps, study abroad for your Master's, or do some backpacking in Europe or South America (with that one I would suggest bringing a friend & a Spanish- English dictionary). It will give you experiences that might lead you to a direction that is better for you.

 

I went to this place in Guatemala called Lago de Atitlan. It was the most beautiful place I have ever seen, surrounded by 3 very poor little towns dealing with the aftermath of a hurricane. I always thought about what it would have been like if I just stayed there.

 

You have to look at the positive side of this. All those things I mentioned.. they are things you probably couldn't do if you had a job, husband & kids you couldn't leave. You have a great opportunity to do something that most people don't have the time for.

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Hey, know the feeling. Do you have any publishing houses nearby to you? And also, what area of publishing are you interested in? I did a degree in Publishing Media so may have some kind of advice for you. One thing to consider may be doing unpaid work in a publishing house, even just for a few weeks if you can. Because people in the publishing world look for experience as well as qualifications. Is it editing you want to get in to?

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Hey... I am feeling the pressure with turning 28 in a couple weeks.... but I recently realised that I am the only one who put those timelines on myself, that I am living, and am loving, and why should I have to reach certain goals by a certain time to feel fulfilled?! Maybe the trick is in learning to just "do" instead of having some goal to reach?

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Thank you everyone for all your responses! They cheered me up a bit.

 

It's hard not to get down...I do think doing something wildly bold though is the key right now. We only live once, right? I don't want to have any regrets later in life. Maybe it will mean taking the road less traveled...maybe it will mean facing chasms and great mountains to climb...but hopefully, it will be worth it in the end.

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Hey, know the feeling. Do you have any publishing houses nearby to you? And also, what area of publishing are you interested in? I did a degree in Publishing Media so may have some kind of advice for you. One thing to consider may be doing unpaid work in a publishing house, even just for a few weeks if you can. Because people in the publishing world look for experience as well as qualifications. Is it editing you want to get in to?

 

I thought I wanted to get into publishing but I found the competition is FIERCE. I have a degree but not the experience most companies are looking for, unfortunately. Most of my jobs prior to school were in the mortgage industry, which I disdain and vow never to go back to!

 

I wanted to start somewhere as an editorial assistant and get a feel for publishing. I thought it would be a great way to get my foot in the door and learn all the ins and outs...

 

I suppose I was naive. Any advice you have would be helpful, but I'm seriously second guessing if that's the right field for me now.

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I feel I am getting too old to not have it figured out.

 

I don't think you can ever be too old to not have it figured out. I'm also 28 and I don't have anything figured out. I work in a video store. I have no career ambitions whatsoever. I don't sweat it. I'll figure things out in time. I'm in no hurry. I'm determined to do something I love even if it pays poorly. That's better, I think, than getting rich doing something you hate. I have no relationship either and no prospects whatsoever. Again, no rush. It'll probably happen eventually. I really have no desire to get married so I'm not looking for anything serious. That's just me, though.

 

I'm a firm believer that there are no life standards. I think it's ridiculous to be expected to accomplish things by a certain age. With people I know it seems that the standard is "You've gotta be married by 25. You've gotta have kids by 30. You've gotta have a solid career and own your own house by 30. If not, you're a loser." Screw all that. That's nonsense. I'm willfully rebelling against that garbage. Anyone who doesn't like it can... do something that I can't type here. I live up to no one's expectations. No one. I don't live to please other people. It's a terrible way to live to be constantly making sure that you comply with other people's standards. I won't do it.

 

Look at my signature. That pretty much sums it up.

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I thought I wanted to get into publishing but I found the competition is FIERCE. I have a degree but not the experience most companies are looking for, unfortunately. Most of my jobs prior to school were in the mortgage industry, which I disdain and vow never to go back to!

 

I wanted to start somewhere as an editorial assistant and get a feel for publishing. I thought it would be a great way to get my foot in the door and learn all the ins and outs...

 

I suppose I was naive. Any advice you have would be helpful, but I'm seriously second guessing if that's the right field for me now.

 

I'm trying to get into photography, it's pretty much the same. You'll rarely find someone who got into photography by applying for a job in photography and going from there. You need a reputation as a good photographer first, by being a good amateur and most photographers are freelance. I don't know whether this applies to publishing but it's worth thinking of ways in that don't involve getting a regular job in publishing as a first step.

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