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How to know whether you're just her "rebound guy"?


BusyNAbroad

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"Rebound guy" is defined as a guy a woman seeks a temporary, non-serious, relationship with until she got over with a major break up, often for the mere sake of distraction and filling the void of emotions.

 

Are there any typical symptoms or typical behaviors that women express when they use you as their "rebound guy"?

 

e.g. Do they say romantic things that seem to be quoted from a popular book/movie, or perhaps so spontaneous that you feel they didn't think about it properly before saying it?

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Rebounds can last years... it's not just a temporary thing. The idea of a rebound relationship is that this person is so uncomfortable with being single and hurt that they want to lose those feelings by attaching to someone new. Sometimes these relationships fall apart because of the baggage brought along, and other times they extend for longer lengths of time because of the very same dependencies that began the relationship.

 

Pretty much anyone who goes from a long term relationship into something new within a short time after the break up is rebounding. Whether they want to admit it or not.

 

Not all rebounds turn out to be bad things, but it's often the case that when they do rebound they don't end up working through the issues that caused the breakup and those things come back and repeat themselves in the next relationship.

 

I've made it a point to avoid getting into something with someone fresh out of another relationship. Saves time and troubles.

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If she constantly talks about her ex or mentions him a lot. Or is still trying to talk to him or get back with him.

 

definitely if she talks about her ex a lot.

 

Also if she wants to rush into things. assuming her previous relationship had lasted a reasonable length of time, then she'd probably get frustrated at starting slowly and still being in the "new" phase of a relationship. so might try and rush it into the comfortable "been together a while" phase.

 

But yes, rebounds arent necessarily bad. to an extent all subsequent relationships after your first are rebounds, as you trial and error your way through all relationships.

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What I'm still trying to understand is whether this girl I like is actually serious with me or not...

 

She never speaks about any boyfriend, but sometimes - while talking on MSN - just disappears without explaining why. And then returns as if nothing had happened... (or says MSN had problems).

 

Also if she wants to rush into things. assuming her previous relationship had lasted a reasonable length of time, then she'd probably get frustrated at starting slowly and still being in the "new" phase of a relationship. so might try and rush it into the comfortable "been together a while" phase.

 

I think I noticed something like this. She was very enthusiastic about the fact that I was reciprocating her feelings...

But now I am not sure why. We knew each other since long time from an exchange program from high school. I am 100% this girl was infatuated with me for a 3-4 years before we met again, and I know through friends from her city that she used to talk a lot about me during those years...

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