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Hi!! I have read some amazing advices in this forum.So i want your point of view for this messy situation i have gotten myself into.

 

i got in touch (on phone)with an old school friend a couple of months ago after a period of about 6 years.Her residence is in my city .We got along very well and then later i confessed to her how much i loved her then but could never speak my mind in school.I then went on to confess that i still love her.

 

She was happy & was very upbeat .She also said that how different i was from other guys & how badly she needed a guy like me.She also sent me some passionate messages.We started interacting regularly .

 

Then after about a couple of weeks, she mentioned her friend who is filthy rich(an industrialist's son) & dotes on her(she has known him for last 3 years) and even wants to marry her in future.He has even met her family & she mentioned how her(younger)brothers & her parents are smitten by him & keep teasing them to settle down.She spoke of how he overwhelms her with expensive gifts & exquisite dinners. Initially she insisted she was not romantically inclined towards him but slowly she started praising him more & more.

 

Another thing is that guy is her batchmate & she always stays with him.They go out for movies,to eateries & even on short trips.They study together too.

 

i never questioned anything and never showed any envy towards him & always listened patiently.

We used to talk daily but after 4-5 weeks of incessant communication ,she suddenly backed off & mentioned that she was having big problems & that she could not confide in me about them..then came this lull & since last 2 weeks we have not spoken much & even texting has reduced considerably because she does not reply all day & makes me wait for long intervals.

 

I wrote her the best poetry ,i have been so patient & caring. i told her how much it hurts to be not speaking with her and i literally do feel pangs of immense despair when she ignores me.I asked her to come clean & speak the truth & let me know if i was an unrequited distraction.

At one point her apathy made me feel suicidal..

 

Now she says she does not want to hurt me & does not understand the need to speak everyday,plus she added how her friends didn't like how she was 'wasting' all her time with me.She said we have spoken enough & her friends (& ofcourse that guy) are important and deserve her attention.She said she had fights with this dude over me & everyone hated this.

 

I come from a normal working class background pursuing engineering and can never spend like that other guy.Also she is quite short tempered & has had quite a few moodswings when she lashed out at me for no apparent reasons & later apologized.But i have been at the receiving end of her rants & ego trips on quite a number of occasions.

 

Though we are managing to text in night before sleeping but i am seriously not feeling anything anymore.Everyone here suggests that i should let go and stop being so dumb and reticent.They want me to stop all communication to heal from this shock.Even i feel i have given all i can & that its really time to move on & focus solely on my academics now.

 

Though she is about to come to my city soon for vacation,for about 10 days but now, though, i really love her , i dont want to meet her because it will hurt me a lot when she will leave.

 

So should i call it quits with her??I can't stay friends with her after having spoken so much..(i have literally bared my soul to her,showed her the real me.)

 

Do all you people also think i should end everything before she arrives here for vacation??She still has 18 months of studies left, & in this period she will stay with that guy only.(While i will graduate after 8 months) .

 

Please do opine!!

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the thing you have to keep in mind, money is nothing, she speaks highly of him yeah, but that doesn't make him the better man.

 

and meet her, it will hurt you alot more after she leaves if you didn't take the chance.

 

but do you want to ? lets face it, you love what you KNEW of her, not what she is now, infact from your point of view, shes nagging, extremely shallow and surface value.

 

donno seem to be on the right lines?

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It doesn't sound like she is that interested in you and it sounds like she has set her sights on Richie Rich's bank account. You sound a bit needy and need to get a grip on that...making grand declarations of love when you only just reconnected is a bit much....feeling sucidal because she doesn't talk to you as much is also over the top. You really need to take a step back and put this into perspective. She doesn't sound like a very nice person and I think being around her will just do you more emotionaly harm than good. I think it is time to call it a day with her and not bother seeing her when she comes in. It doesn't sound like she is worth the aggravation.

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the thing you have to keep in mind, money is nothing, she speaks highly of him yeah, but that doesn't make him the better man.

 

and meet her, it will hurt you alot more after she leaves if you didn't take the chance.

 

but do you want to ? lets face it, you love what you KNEW of her, not what she is now, infact from your point of view, shes nagging, extremely shallow and surface value.

 

donno seem to be on the right lines?

 

She keeps showering accolades over him because despite being the hottest guy in her college(he has the best looks and is the best soccer player you see) he has spurned all other girls for her.

 

She does not talk to me all day because she stays with this guy(& her group) all the time, in her classroom , library, then movies or any other fun stuff.He & her friends despise her conversations with me so she does not want to antagonize them.

 

Usually they even go out for dinners all by themselves.This guy is best friends with her parents & everything looks set for a long term relationship.

 

What i regret is why she got into a fling with me & left me all alone.It was very promising initially but now its a complete turnaround of events.I don't matter anymore to her.

 

its a cruel joke but i know i'm not the only hurt guy around,may be i'll find someone better very soon.:sad:

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It doesn't sound like she is that interested in you and it sounds like she has set her sights on Richie Rich's bank account. You sound a bit needy and need to get a grip on that...making grand declarations of love when you only just reconnected is a bit much....feeling sucidal because she doesn't talk to you as much is also over the top. You really need to take a step back and put this into perspective. She doesn't sound like a very nice person and I think being around her will just do you more emotionaly harm than good. I think it is time to call it a day with her and not bother seeing her when she comes in. It doesn't sound like she is worth the aggravation.

 

Yeah.This is what everyone around has advised me.I was probably too carried away to have been that mushy.I thought my first love had returned miraculously & all that felt like a fairytale.Lol..but life ain't that simple and straight.

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