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My ex GF is acting a fool...


WhatJStoDo

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Wow, where to start,

 

My young (24) GF broke up with me 5 weeks ago, said there was no other man, she just did not feel the same. anyhow. Come to find out, she has been having drinks with one of my best friends....who has a fiance. She called me last night and said she caught them kissing.

 

I know I should walk away, but I think she is making a big mistake, I want her to realize that he is just using her... and throwing away a good thing.

 

What on earth to do now.

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I know we all want to rush and help people even Ex's but the thing is you have to let people make their mistakes and fall on their face and make of fool of themselves, that way they learn to not do it again. When dealing with adults sometimes all you can do is stand back and watch the show.

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I know, I need to let her go.

 

She still loves me though, she's an alcoholic, and I think her judgement is seriously clouded.

 

I'm looking at this like a family member would. I know she is screwing up, and I'm strong enough to deal with it. She needs help and I'll always be there for her. True love never dies, although it can get misplaced.

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yeah - she'll realize she's F*ing it up soon enough... especially when that chick's fiancee gets a mouthful of " i'm going to leave you if you continue hooking up with this 24 year old. " that should be enough to send shiz flying into the fan. hope you brought your golashes and protective gear!!! seriously, though - i'd question wanting to be with someone if they're pulling shiz like this.

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And how do you think you're going to make her see she's making a mistake?

 

She's made her bed, I think she can lay in it. She sounds like a f**king train wreck. She's an alcoholic with loose morals that leaves someone she supposedly "loves" to sneak around with his engaged-to-be-married best friend.

 

Your supposed best friend stabs you in the back as well as his fiancee, obviously not giving a f*** about either of you.

 

What a pair.

 

Why create drama in your life that isn't necessary? Walk away from them both. She's not your problem anymore, and neither is he.

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I agree with the other posters, there's nothing you can do to show her that she's making a mistake. She's got to realize it herself. It may take her awhile, especially if she's stubborn, but she'll eventually realize what she's doing.

 

Any attempt by you to show her the wrongs of her ways will most likely cause her to dig her heels in and keep doing what she's doing.

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Just let her get on with it. The only thing that will come of you giving advice is for you to be the bad guy that cant take it on the chin.

 

What about your friend? What is HE getting into this for? And isn't it a bit out of order to be messing around with her ... I mean you do still care for her right?!

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well, we both are. The difference is that I can admit it. She has had an impossible to deal with upbringing. I'm not sure how to explain, but she is like family to me. I know she makes stupid mistakes, but she really does have a heart of gold. She came to see me last night at the pub accross from my hotel. We had fun. I really need to salvage what we've had. I know she's a case, but she has problems. I'll always be there for her. Like I said, it's like family.

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Being there for her is fine but you cannot prevent her from making her own mistakes. You are there for her as a friend so make sure you do not take the role of a parent. Father-child patterns in relationships between two adults are not healthy for either of you!

 

Also, be there for yourself too! She's fooling around with a good friend of yours soon after you break up. There is an element of disrespect for you there from both of them. These things happens and it is great if you can really not get ruffled up by it but make sure you take care of yourself now eh!!

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It's lovely of you to be concerned, but anything you do to get involved is just going to make her think you are jealous, unforunately, you are just going to have to sit this one out and try your best notto even get involved with your friends' fiance's emotions... as this can only get messy!

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