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I haven't thought about suicide in over a year... but my ex is dying and I don't know how I'm going to even begin to handle it. We were together 4 years and broke up 3 months ago, and have been NC.

 

A part of me just wants to tell him let's get back together and work things out... but I know that is just me feeling guilty and wanting to ease his pain before he dies...

 

This whole thing is just tearing me up inside... i don't know what to do to get past it or how to deal with it or anything.

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I haven't thought about suicide in over a year... but my ex is dying and I don't know how I'm going to even begin to handle it. We were together 4 years and broke up 3 months ago, and have been NC.

 

A part of me just wants to tell him let's get back together and work things out... but I know that is just me feeling guilty and wanting to ease his pain before he dies...

 

This whole thing is just tearing me up inside... i don't know what to do to get past it or how to deal with it or anything.

 

as dark as everything seems to you right now.. and believe me .. I know what you feel.. don't ever even consider that it's in anyway your fault .. people get sick, some recover, some pass away .. we cry and mourne and move on and try to always remember them .. the fact the you guys broke up had nothing to do with it and you need to really believe that to even start moving forward and do the right thing in this situation.. I read on this other post that you've given him your contact already, not I think it's up to him if he want to use it or not .. he may not want to .. may feel even worse seeing you again.. knowing that nothing can happen anyway because of his condition .. so I strongly believe you did the right thing and now the power in on his side .. all that's left to do for you is pray for him..

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I feel so alone in this... I don't have any RL friends except my boyfriend so I go to online forums for advice a lot... I always feel like I post too many threads but today someone sent me a message telling me stop wasting the forum's time with threads about my ex. (Not the thread about him dying but the other thread.)

 

I know it shouldn't matter since it's just a random person online, but the fact that I was already afraid I was posting too much and them telling me that just kind of confirms it. It made me feel horrible.

 

I knwo it's kind of random but I needed to vent about that.

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I feel so alone in this... I don't have any RL friends except my boyfriend so I go to online forums for advice a lot... I always feel like I post too many threads but today someone sent me a message telling me stop wasting the forum's time with threads about my ex. (Not the thread about him dying but the other thread.)

 

I know it shouldn't matter since it's just a random person online, but the fact that I was already afraid I was posting too much and them telling me that just kind of confirms it. It made me feel horrible.

 

I knwo it's kind of random but I needed to vent about that.

 

whoever that person was that sent you a message is def not welcome on the ena forums. defeats the purpose of the forum altogether!! by all means, continue to use this forum as an outlet. everyone that comes accross this site has the right to. there is not one issue, or user, that is less important than another. we are here to give you our sincere, honest and genuine thoughts on your issues. i strongly suggest you alert a moderator on who sent you that private message, because that was more than a toe out of line!

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