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So I guess I'm the bad guy...


fivespot

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So I've been talking to this girl for a few weeks now. We never really talked about the dating issue...just mostly get to know you kind of stuff. So a few days ago, one of my favorite restaurants came up in conversation. She said she'd like to check it out, maybe on Saturday night.

 

Well, I was talking to her on the phone yesterday and I conviently avoided the date and restaurant idea and just said, well I'll talk to you tomorrow.

 

So she brought it up. "Aren't we going out tonight?" she asked. So I told her I didn't know she still wanted to go...but said, sure. I'll call you later to when I'm ready to leave, when I'll pick you up, etc.

 

Well I called her a few times later like I said I would, but she never picked up and never called me back. I haven't heard from her since yesterday.

 

So I guess she's mad that I wasn't more enthusiastic about it. But here's the thing. She's still basically with her ex. She says they talk at least every day, and she still sees him at least once a week.

 

So of course, I'm thinking I'm either the rebound or plan B.

 

And this info about the ex came up after the "date" idea. That's why I avoided it.

 

So should I feel bad? Should I apologize? I don't feel like I did anything wrong, but I don't feel very good, either.

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She's still with her ex? (i.e., he's not her ex, he's her boyfriend)

 

Don't become romantically involved unless you know this other guy is out of the picture. You'd be setting yourself up to be a plan B, or at the very least a self-esteem boost to her. Don't apologize. You did nothing wrong, she did.

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Sounds a bit ambiguous. She said she'd like to check it out - but did you ever make a definite plan for Saturday?

 

If she is still with her ex, then maybe give it a miss...

 

You have made the effort, leave it in her hands now. How rude that she didn't even bother to text / call and say she couldn't make it....

 

Weird girl! Don't stress, you're not the bad guy given the context of the scenario I don't think anyway!

 

Ammy

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