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What extreme measures have u resorted to in order to maintain NC?


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You can try making a list of all the horrible things he's done and keep looking at that when you feel the urge to call.

 

This is what is pissing me off. I have done that and there are so many bad things on the list, it would be enough to make anyone's hair stand up. And for the last 26 days i think it's what has been keeping me from contacting him but now it's like the bad things dont matter anymore.

I am scared coz i am passed the stage of just wanting contact with him, i want to take him back.

I am so messed up right now.

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well my ex calls me atleast twice a day evryday since breakup...its about 2 weeks now I have not uttered a single word to her or called,texted,or any form of contact.She keeps adding me on facebook i keep ignoring her request.

She calls me at my work i drop the phone without saying anything........

thats the extent i am going to keep my NC.

She cheated on me, i suffered now she deserves to suffer 10 folds in return

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Hey littlestar,

the first month of NC is the hardest, at least it was for me. Hang in there, it will get better. There is no time limit on healing, everyone is different. I still think about my ex everyday, but at least he's not the first thing on my mind when I wake up anymore. Punch a pillow, exercise, call a friend, do anything BUT contact your ex. You need to focus on yourself. I know it sucks, and I know it will take a long time - I'm still in the process.

Hang in there.

Best of luck,

Joy

 

Edit: Contacting him now is only a band-aid, you'll feel better temporarily but puts you back in your overall healing.

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To avoid impulsive acts of NC breakage, I've given my laptop to a friend to keep for a weekend and I've kept my phone in my car. One thing that really worked was for the first week, I kept my cell phone off (I have a home phone but no one including myself knows the number!). I told my friends I was doing this so to just leave voicemail messages to reach me instead of texts. I checked my voicemail with my home phone to make sure I didn't miss any important work related calls, etc. Also, my phone doesn't go to voicemail right away when it's off for some reason so a caller can't tell & my ex never left messages. I turned my phone off for a week because I knew if my ex called, I would likely text him back. If he didn't call, I would likely text him just to start contact out of anger he didn't contact me. With my phone turned off, I didn't know if he had called or not and thus didn't know which approach to take via text so I did nothing.

 

Point of this really, is knowing your weaknesses and knowing how to avoid them at your most vulnerable. After that first week, I was much stronger and was ok to keep my phone on. Any days I felt down, I turned it off. The increasingly smaller part of me that hoped he contacted me was appeased because there was that slight chance he called when my phone was off. And not having my phone on also prevented me from impulsive texting.

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--^ Good advice! I've done similar things.

 

I've blocked his social networking pages from my browser, told friends not to tell me if they hear from him, avoided his workplace and hometown, taken herbal remedies to keep my head clear so I won't contact him, etc.

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Hi. I tried doing NC many times with my ex. I would never contact him, but when he would contact me I would always reply. All he would have to do was say, I'm sorry or I miss you and I would take him back only to be treated poorly again. After doing this at least 7 times in 2 and 1/2 years I finally changed my phone number and deleted my e mail account. It was worth the aggravation of having to give everyone my new number. The only way he can get in touch with me is to come to my house and I know he wouldn't have the guts to do that. I used to secretly hope that he would contact me so that I could ignore him, but I never could ignore him! This way, I don't have to worry about it anymore. I can tell I am getting over him much faster than I ever did during our previous breakups.

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