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Have a better outlook today...am I accepting it's over?


Strung_Out00
Starting Over In a Relationship - B...
Starting Over In a Relationship - Beginners Guide

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Hey guys,

 

Last night before practicing with my band, one of the guys was talking about his brother who almost lost his fingers in an accident and how our incompetent hospital was just going to throw them away because there was nothing they could do, he ended up getting them reattached in a better hospital, I brought up the story of my new ex who almost lost her foot and the same hospital said there was nothing they could do...she ended up getting it fixed at a better hospital. The new lead singer we are auditioning asked who she was, and said "Consider yourself better off. Yeah, I think she's absolutely gorgeous, but that's about all she has going for her. Did she ever graduate or get her GED? Because she felt like she didn't need it because J*** (her ex before me) was going to take over his father's construction company and make alot of money."

 

I heard stories of how they were on and off for 3 years, how she was screwing around on him when they were on breaks and that's she's really not that intelligent of a person. This girl also said "She better pray that her looks hold up or else she's going to find herself living in a trailer on welfare." I've heard before that's she's just looking for a sugar daddy, and she (my ex) denies it, but I think that it's true. Don't get me wrong, she's very nice, thoughtful, beautiful, and funny, but other than that, there's not a whole lot of substance. At times it was impossible to hold intelligent conversation with her, not that I want to call her stupid, but she def. isn't too smart.

 

I'm starting to think that I was confusing love with infatuation and lust. I was more caught up in her beauty, her bangin' body and how incredible the sex was instead of the person she really is. I still care for her and hopes she grows up a little bit and maybe makes something of herself other than a waitress and daycare worker. Everyone tells me that she isn't worth my aggravation and tears, and I think they may be right. I just didn't have what she was looking for...and alot of that was money and material things. (to each his/her own) She also didn't feel as strongly for me as I did her. It was only a 4 month relationship, that was very rocky at times...trust issues towards me, feelings for her ex...etc. I still think about her, but as of right now I don't have the stomach twisting anxiety. She's dated and had sex with guys before me and will date and have sex with guys after me and there's nothing I can do.

 

This poor bastard she's already with has no idea what he's getting himself into.

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Sounds to me that you accepting that it's over. Good for you!! Looks aren't everything and they will only get you so far, people age and looks fade.

I'm starting to think that I was confusing love with infatuation and lust. I was more caught up in her beauty, her bangin' body and how incredible the sex was instead of the person she really is. I still care for her and hopes she grows up a little bit and maybe makes something of herself other than a waitress and daycare worker
Sounds a bit like maybe it was only infatuation like you say and lust, but you do still respect her and care where she ends up in life. I think you will find a girl who is worth your while and who isn't only focusing on materialistic things. Also, you said she still had feelings for her ex..that is just a heartache and headache on your end waiting to happen, I just got out of a relationship where the dude kept trying to convince me he was over his ex and in the long run he was just trying to convince himself and using me as a way to forget about her. Best of luck, keep your head up and congrats on the progress of getting over her.
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