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Do I have serious issues? What shall I do?


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I Have Feelings For Someone Else Wh...
I Have Feelings For Someone Else While In a Relationship

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Hey my friends

 

I don't know if this has happened to any of you but I believe so, at least to some of you.

I have the feeling that my ex is going out with a friend of mine. This is only a suspicion from my side since I don't have any evidences of it.

In my mind they are going out for coffee but my fears are that it might develop into something more intimate. I really don't know why I'm constantly thinking about it without any evidences. And to make it worse, I'm not sure if he would tell me anything if that was true.

 

Anyway, this is something I must accept as being a possibility that can be true or not. That's their life and I don't have anything to do with it.

The main issue here is that, basically, I'm not feeling very good to be with this friend because I'm always feeling suspicious. By other hand most of the times I'm the one who calls him to go out just because I find very boring to be alone and he's the only friend I have to go out with.

 

This also makes me feel as if I'm annoying and needy. So, I tend to avoid calling him. And I think he's already suspicious about what I'm thinking because I believe people can sense these things.

These thoughts have occurr more than once in the last two years, since the break-up, and they have beem a major obstacle in my healing.

 

What would you do in my shoes? Is this natural?

 

M&M

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I would like to have the strengh to talk to him about this but the fact is that I feel a total freak because, after almost 2 years, I still haven't forgot this girl. I think this is not normal.

And I don't want to admit it to him, altough he probably knows that because I always avoid to go to the places where she is.

And by other hand, it would be unfair to him.

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They seem to communicate very well with each other, even their body language indicates that. First I knew her online and then, so that we can meet personally, we went all together on a trip...for whatever reason she developed feeling for me but they always seemed to communicate better with each other than me and her.

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How close are you with this friend of yours?

 

But either way, a friend is NOT a friend if she/he is dating your ex. (don't care how long the relationship has been broken) I think it is wrong.

 

But you have to be sure that something is going on cos u may be building up false images and believing them to the extent that you can be accusing someone when they are innocent. But on the other hand - well maybe it is true. But you need to be sure. Maybe just step back and see what happens, but getting on with your life.

 

I know how you feel cos I have/am going thru the same thing. But I cannot prove anything concrete right now if something is going on. Suspicions just build up - on some facts that add up and on some facts that are coincidence, and on some facts that are also built up in our imagination. It can be very un easy cos you keep asking - would they really do this to me, back stab me, pretend to be a friend whilst seeing someone I loved.

 

But I do believe the Truth always comes out either way

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Hi S' agapo

 

I know this friend for many years, more than 20. Although we know each other for so long, we have never talked much about these intimate things... I have never seen him with a girlfriend and I never talked with him about mine.

 

I understand that a friend is not a friend if he starts to date someone I love. I do think the same way, but let's face the facts...he might have a different oppinion. Even if he doesn't, would he reject what could be a meaningfull relationship just because of my feeling?. Probably not !!!

By other hand, almost two years have passed and usually this is enough time for someone to heal. Unfortunately, this is not the case.

 

I know how you feel cos I have/am going thru the same thing. But I cannot prove anything concrete right now if something is going on. Suspicions just build up - on some facts that add up and on some facts that are coincidence, and on some facts that are also built up in our imagination. It can be very un easy cos you keep asking - would they really do this to me, back stab me, pretend to be a friend whilst seeing someone I loved.

 

You described perfectly what's happening inside my head. Because I can't distinguish what's coincidence and facts from fiction, I won't accuse him of anything. And never will !!!!

If my suspicions turn out to be true, it would be very painfull and I would be extremely disappointed wiht him but I don't want to be an obstacle to someone's happyness. However, it would damage our friendship a lot.

 

Just like you, I do believe the truth always comes out and life always works in strange ways.

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