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gracerules2008
Starting Over In a Relationship - B...
Starting Over In a Relationship - Beginners Guide

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Well my girlfriend officially broke it off this morning. It's all over. This is what I get for standing up for myself. My opinions and feelings never mattered to her.

 

I'm sure there are plenty of guys out there who can be unemotional and never feel insulted during the relationship because that's what most women want apparently.

 

I'm going to live in hell for the next 80 years! Everything I do from here on out is inconsequential since I've lost the only thing that really mattered to me in this existence!

 

Welcome to hell for it is here on earth and not in the next life!

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I'm going to live in hell for the next 80 years! Everything I do from here on out is inconsequential since I've lost the only thing that really mattered to me in this existence!

 

Welcome to hell for it is here on earth and not in the next life!

 

You relax.

 

Take some time off for yourself, breathe, eat, chill, exercise. Don't blow things out of proportion. *hugs*

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Grace, grace, grace...

 

Get angry, get mad, get crying, get grieving... and cry until you have no more tears to cry... this is all normal and part of the healing process, my friend. You will feel a little better you may not, but what you would have achieved would be you releasing all that pain and raw emotional hurt... day by day... and that is much better than bottling them all up or going to the pub. So don't go and get yourself drunk, alcohol is a depressant and it'll make you feel far worse!!

 

Seek your family and friends too for their love and support. YOU WILL get through this... Most of us have been there.

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That's too bad. I saw your other thread and was hoping you two would talk it out. I hope she doesn't start posting on this thread and turn it into a war between you guys...I think your other thread was going in that direction. I hope that she is able to post and get advice too and that you stay away from her threads if she decides to post. I wish you both the best of luck.

 

I know you're venting, but please don't be so down on women, in general. Most of us do not want a guy who is unemotional and never feels anything.

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I think I drank for about a month straight after my breakup. I don't recommend that route at all. Yet, once I got out of that funk and sulking...I really started to make some major changes in my life and have transformed into a much better person.

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Well it turns out that I had a misunderstanding with her. I'm the stupid one here. She broke up with me not because I stood up for myself but because I said some hurtful things over the phone that pushed her away.

 

I told her out of anger that I didn't want a relationship and that maybe I needed to be with a few women who would treat me like crap. So that really hurt her.

 

She also got fed up with my doublemindedness. I was always changing my mind about stuff constantly. One minute I would say I want her to spoil me and then 10 minutes later I would say that I don't want her to do anything for me.

 

I've got a serious problem of "push & pull behavior. I want to be loved unconditionally and then when I finally get it in overwhelming proportions I become stubborn and push her love away. I want to put a stop to all of this. My stubbornness has serious consequences that I'm finally reaping.

 

So she said that I need to figure out what I really want. She is right. She says I need to tell her right away when she has offended me instead of waiting until hours or days later when all my anger has festered inside and not take it out on a bunch of strangers on a message forum.

 

So she has put our relationship in a suspended status and wants to work on friendship. We had a long talk on the phone last night about these issues and some other issues that I need to address and take care of.

 

So no I am not better off without her. If anything she should be the one doing NC on me because I've put her through this rollercoaster. We would fight like everyday or every other day over petty stuff.

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