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should i contact him?


Gratsy

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A while back I was unfortunately forced to make an NC with a friend that I had a crush on. He said we couldn't be more than friends, basically, and I wasn't happy with that so I ended the friendship. It wasn't necessarily on bad terms, either, but we never really spoke again. Is it complete foolishness to think that it would be okay to contact him through e-mail? See, no amount of even a one word "hi" with this person wouldn't be loaded with meaning. Should I just let it go and realize that this person isn't going to be in my life anymore? I don't know how he'd react to an e-mail, or even if he'd care. Or if I'd be hurt...which my main goal is to make sure I don't get hurt. I just found a funny, light hearted joke that I wanted to share with him...to see if he's forgotten about me.

 

Am I okay with the idea that he might hate me? Or that he might not even consider me? Is this a way of trying to convince myself that he cared? Did he care? I mean, isn't it proof that he didn't since he doesn't contact me? Or is he just doing what I asked him to do?

 

I don't want him to completely forget me. I want him to miss me.

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Well..it wouldn't be right for him to contact you when he asked the same of you. If you are still afraid that you may get hurt, it might be a good idea to keep the NC. I mean..what if he doesn't respond? Are you going to be torn about that? There's a possibility that you may not get a response or the one that you are looking for and you could so quickly go back to where you started. My opinion...just leave it alone..it will only confuse things ..for you and probably not him.

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Do you think I'll go back to where I started? I don't think I'd care too much if he didn't respond. I'd probably expect it. Or perhaps it would? I don't think it would but maybe it will?

 

He didn't ask me to leave him alone, I asked him to leave me alone.

 

I mean, what is my motivation? Probably to see if I meant anything to him.

 

Would it matter? I don't know.

 

I mean, it took me a long time to get over him.

 

I haven't found anyone else, but I think over the past year my self esteem has improved b/c he hasn't been around to make me feel "not good enough".

 

Perhaps neither of us are bad people but neither of us could handle the other's company maturely.

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I want him to miss me.

 

If you want him to miss you... don't email him.

 

The best thing to tell yourself right now is that maybe you can be friends someday, but only when you are in a real relationship with someone that you love. Then you will be able to drop a casual hello email to him without it making or breaking your world.

 

It doesn't sound like you are remotely ready to email him right now.

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I'm not sure if it would make or break my world since he hasn't been in it for five months though. But, at the same time, I do want him to miss me and maybe that shows that I still have some weird unaddressed feelings when it comes to him.

 

Its probably just better left alone.

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