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Severely depressed, lonely and stressed out.


fribjits

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Thanks for reading this, I don't know where else to turn.

 

Quick intro: I'm a 20 year old college student going to San Jose State.

 

Basically, a lot of things are really eating at me, and it's all pushing me to the edge and making life no fun to live in.

 

Main reason #1: I'm lonely. Both Physically and emotionally. I'm a virgin and never had a real relationship before. I feel ugly and unwanted. I feel that no girl would ever consider me attractive and want to be with me. I try to talk to girls all the time on campus and I tried tons of online dating but I always get put into the friendzone or they think I'm creepy and I get rejected. I'm just not an attractive guy, so a girl might see me as funny or in a goofy way, or just weird. I've heard the regular spiel that I'll find someone if I wait long enough. But I've read online articles of men who were 30, 40, and even 50 years old and still virgins! I don't want to end up like that! I just want a girl to cuddle with and kiss. I just want/wish/pray for a girl who will hug me, tell me that she thinks I'm handsome, and say that she loves being around me.

 

Main reason #2: I feel inferior. I live in an international house dorm on campus and I am easily the ugliest one there. It's tough when I'm surrounded by all these good looking people all the time. Also, everyone there has amazing talents, like some can play piano or sing beautifully. A lot of them can play sports well, or draw, etc etc. Me? What can I do? I can get past the library on legendary... (Kudos to anyone who caught that reference). Ihat's about it. I'm basically untalented at everything and I'm just average in my classes. i find it hard to concentrate on school stuff because I don't really have any motivation. And on campus the place is filled with talented people living fulfilling lives and they always seem happy or at least pleasant. Me? My emotions bounce around too much. One day I'll be alright, and the next day I'll feel down, and so forth. My emotional state isn't consistent.

 

I just feel useless in the world and I really need just need to feel loved and needed. I made a aquaintance friends here, but no one close enough where I could just ask for a hug. Plus I'm a guy so it'd be weird to ask for something like that to another guy. And since I have no skill with women and I'm fugly I feel like I'm never gonna have a girl to hold in my arms.

 

I just feel useless and lonely and ugly and depressed.

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Ok, first (((hugs)))

 

I am sorry you feel this way. College can be a really lonely experience, but it seems to me that you are actually on the verge of becoming depressed. I don't think you're actually ugly, or that no one is interested in you. But I know how easy it is to feel that this is the case.

 

Do you do anything next to your studies, like sports?

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This is not an unusual feeling. There is a lot of people that feel that way. If you keep feeling that you are ugly and that know one really understands you. Then you are very wrong. If you keep thinking that then all will be as is. Not everyone is perfect and I know that it is hard to realize that we are all beautiful in our own ways. Change your way of thinking and just understand that you are still young and that you will find many good friends while you are at college. You will find that special someone when that time is right. Faith will find you just right now may not be the time. Be patient and all will eventually fall into place.

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dude don't ever feel that way about yourself

 

the way you look at yourself is the way your life will always be

 

you need to wake up tomorrow and have a new confidence about yourself,everything you have done about yourself have failed,so why not try something new

 

think back when you was a kid,and had heros and stuff you looked up too,you can use that to build up your confidence

 

listen to your favorite bands,study what makes them so cool,from their style of clothing,attitude etc.rememeber your favorite music is pieces of you

 

I remember I was sorta like you in highschool,I didn't have that confidence afraid of rejection

 

do you realize even the most attractive people get rejected

 

it happens to everyone,but you have to realize you have to say f*ck it,and just go for what you want

 

girls do not want a guy who don't have confidence

 

I suggest you wake up tomorrow,and make some changes about you,maybe your clothing style,hair etc.

 

and have a new attitude,and you will have the woman hounding you down

 

edit

 

it is also a good thing to have a lot of girls as friends

 

they will help you with advice on what women like,don't look at that as a bad thing

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one more thing

 

don't take being a virgin for granted

 

thats the best gift in the world to have from God

 

treasure that,you are a rare breed and should be happy about that

 

do you know how many people have std's these days its not a pretty sight

 

if you can try to hold out into marriage

 

but don't even be ashamed of being a virgin

 

its millions of people who wish they could turn back the hand of time to be one

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well, having lost is probably not that spectacular as you would expect. Life goes on and that special moment is already been shared and in case of a woman you aren't that narrow anymore. I'm not that proud of having lost my virginity though I don't regret it neither.

Please focus at other things than your outside and not having had sex. But I can understand you can miss feeling intimate. Agree those 'problems' are common for students. Feel free to contact me whenever you want.

I wish you the best and please work at the things that seem more positive for you like the studying and making friends etc..

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