I had sex with my best friend...TWICE! but where do i go from here?

[GingaGinga]

I need help to understand what I should do.. This girl and i have been best friends since were little kids and we've shared so many moments together. We were like brother and sister, but eventually as we got older I started developing feelings for her. I knew at one point when i was in another relationship she had feelings for me and when she was in another relationship I had feelings for her. We would always help each other out in a positive and non-selfish way even though we didn't like the people we were with. She's cried to me so many times and i was always her shoulder to lean on, but now were older an recently we ended up alone and for the first time, had sexual intercourse with each other. We weren't virgins, but it wasn't like just any sex. There was a lot of passion involved. She even told me she loved me, which didn't freak me out because the conversation leading to the sex was a really open one about our feelings towards each other,

 

But about a week after the sex, i decided that i wanted to talk to her about what happened and about how i was feeling. I told her that i always had feeling for her, i just never wanted to cross the line as to ruin our friendship and she agreed and told me that she doesnt have sex with just anyone and that obviously she felt the same way, BUT she also said that she didn't want to complicate things between me n her n that our friendship was really important to her. I sort of expected that response but i didn't want to hear that.

 

Not too long after we ended up alone...and it happened again, just as passionate and affectionate as the first...I dont know what to think.

 

people say that they see us together, but not now...a couple years down the road and deep into university when she's ready to settle because she's young and she wants to experience other things. I guess she thinks that if we ended up together it would have to work out because then our friendship would be ruined and i'm the type of guy to be in a relationship and make it work out no matter what...maybe she scared of commiting n letting go of her "freedom". I DONT KNOW!

 

She acts normal as if it doesnt phase her..meanwhile i think anbout her all the time.

 

I just need to know how to act or what to do

 

Someone please help

[mellybelly]

I think that maybe you two are meant to be together. After all, the best thing in a relationship, is when the other person is your best friend! It sounds like you two have such a strong bond. Maybe, because you are both young, getting through school...maybe that is why the relationship feels like too big of an issue to handle right now. I would say, if this is the case, stay friends, and focus on these other issues. From what you have said though, you sounds like a great match, and I wouldn't be surprised if it did develop into something more.

 

My only advice is to communicate more with her about it. See where she is coming from and then go from there.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Why are you two fighting it...you clearly both feel the same way for each other so go for it. If you don't there might always be regrets. Hollywood movies always show how romantic it is for two people to clearly have feelings for each other but hold back. Sure it makes for a great movie..but this is real life. If you don't seize the opportunity as it presents itself now, you may never have the opportunity again...you are both single at this point in time, have felt passion with each other that goes deeper than just sex...so why not make those feelings official in a relationship.