tushboy Posted September 10, 2008 Share Posted September 10, 2008 I had sent a mail to my ex with whom I am in NC for few months.. I had pushed him away post break up with my behaviour to the point that he didnt want to see me ever again. I wanted to open lines of communication and sent him a mail telling him how I feel, wondering if we could be friends again.... Today he replied to the mail telling me we could get back together but only as friends, he said he respected my feelings but doesnt feel the same for me. He also told me I had to promise him I won't get back into the crazy mode again if we do become friends.... I guess in a way this has made it easier for me now to let go totally....not in a limbo anymore. Honestly dont know if I can be his friend, was actually fishing around to see how he felt for me. I guess I'll go back to my NC. I love my NC. It's keeping me out of the mess. I am feeling a bit low....but knowing what he feels will now help me let go. totally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honesty Posted September 10, 2008 Share Posted September 10, 2008 He has been honest. Actions speak louder than words so you go and show him just how dignified you are. Love yourself. Keep your head up. Go NC. He will respect you for that. Do good things and make yourself a better person in any way you can my friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tushboy Posted September 10, 2008 Author Share Posted September 10, 2008 He has been honest. Actions speak louder than words so you go and show him just how dignified you are. Love yourself. Keep your head up. Go NC. He will respect you for that. Do good things and make yourself a better person in any way you can my friend. Yes I admire him for being honest, he's always been, when he said he loved me he was honest, when he fell out of it he was honest again....that's what attracts me to him. He's very straightforward and this is very diff to find in a gay relationship. I still love him like crazy, but I have to let go now. It's high time I let him go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tushboy Posted September 10, 2008 Author Share Posted September 10, 2008 Tushboy, at least he responded and obviously cares for you, even if it's not in the way you want. Mine not only never responded to my emails after we split, he never even OPENED them (I know I was not blocked). It hurt like hell and surprised me (it was not a hostile split). So at least you can know you are not "dead" to him, that you still matter or he would not have responded (or would not have read it). The "be friends" response is better than none. I think it means more than having no response. Yes I know what you mean, actually deep down I was wanting to know if he has forgiven me....and in a way it did feel good that yes he has moved on from that place or hatred and disgust to a more neutral place where he's open to dialogue.. Even though he's stated he wants to be friends, he's also made it very clear he doesn't feel the same way for me as I do, now the ball is in my court...I either start making moves to rekindling the friendship or take solace in NC knowing my feelings won't be reciprocated. At the moment I will do the later, today I do feel relaxed and breathe a sigh of relief knowing that he at least answered back isn't holding any grudges. We both did hurtful thinngs to each other, but it was actually me who drove him away with my madness post break up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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