Taking things too quickly

[la_femelle]

I just got out of a relationship about 3 weeks ago...my boyfriend of 8 months left me for a teenager and proposed to her just 2 weeks later. All of this destroyed the little trust I had in the opposite sex, and it was something very painful for me to go through.

 

Now, less than a month later, I've met another guy who appears to be extremely caring, nice, and trustworthy. I went on a date with him and I like him, but the problem is he likes me a lot MORE than I like him.

 

The problem I'm having is that even though he's a great guy and I would like to get to know him better and spend time with him, I know in my heart that it's too soon for me to rush into a relationship with someone. This guy really believes we will end up in a relationship, and I think it's a possibility...but not right now. I'm not holding back because of a commitment thing...I don't have the desire to go out and meet a bunch of guys...but I'm just not ready to give my whole heart away yet and I don't know how to break that to this new guy, who REALLY likes me a lot.

 

We already went on a date and he's been wanting to see me every day since then...and I keep avoiding it because I don't want to lead him to believe we're going to be a "couple" tomorrow or anything. How do I tell him, without him taking it personally, that although I really want to get to know him I need to be single right now? I know he's going to think it's because I don't want to be tied down, but really it's because I need to focus on myself and give myself time to get over the pain I recently felt. I am terrified of letting anyone come into my life again at the moment, and I don't want to hurt this guy by saying I like hanging out with him but that I can't be his girlfriend any time soon.

 

Does anyone have any advice? Be honest and open with me please, that's what I need right now.

[Mutley]

Just tell him to slow it down...(if he wants a future with you )

 

Honesty is the best policy.

[i_win]

Tell him that you like him, but that things are going way too fast for you. You don't shake his confidence or ruin his pride, but it gets the point accross.

[HeartGoesOn]

Tell him exactly what you said in your post. If nothing else, he'll appreciate your honesty.

 

And, you're correct, you do need time to heal.

 

Wishing you the best...