schaser Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Say if a woman is not widely considered attractive. Is it right for her to approach men that are generally considered attractive? Are leagues bad, or are they simply how life works? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bostonbruins24 Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 It's hard to say,if you are only exclusively trying to meet very attractive people ,it might be difficult to meet someone.Obviously looks are subjective but I think most people know where they stand in the looks department.Most of us are average,so there are compatible partners for most people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaoticbaby Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 it is easier for a woman to approach guys who would be considered "more" attractive, but the sad truth is, these guys aren't looking for a relationship. if you're talking about a one-night stand/booty call i'd say as long as the girl kept herself decent, then she will probably not have a problem finding an attractive man to spend the night with. now, as far as relationships go, "leagues" only exist for the people who think they do. personally, i feel as if many men have a broader spectrum of what they think is attractive in a woman, than women do for other women. to clarify, i think there are a lot of women that a lot of men would find attractive, that a lot of other women would not. so it boils down to confidence and how you carry yourself. i've seen below-average women with above-average men and vice-versa, but these people have a certain swagger about themselves. they have charisma. but the more immature are going to judge based on appearance no matter what. whether "bad" or "good" thats just how life is. if you feel that someone is "out of your league" i'd still say, go for it. if the other person feels that YOU are out of their league, then forget about them. you are probably "out of their league" intelligence-wise anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JadedStar Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 There are certainly "unspoken leagues" but confident people won't give a lot of creedence to them. And ironically those who don't give a lot of creedence to them typically land people more attractive then they are, maybe for the sheer "ballsiness" of it. LOL This is why you see people like Lyle Lovett marrying people like Julia Roberts, or Seal marrying Heidi Klum. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raistlin Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 One of my friends actually yelled at me for telling her that she is out of my league. Since that day, I don't consider myself in a league. Women are out there, and everyone is trying to meet someone. If a woman gives me the signal that she's interested in me, I'll approach her whether she's "average" or "drop dead gorgeous". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeremiah Johnson Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Here's my thoughts: It's the lady's choice if I'm attractive enough for her. If I say up front that she's out of my league, then I've just made a decision for her that was never mine to make. And that's just not a good thing to do on any level. Always let her decide. You don't gain anything by disqualifying yourself and more so, I think it's disrespectful to her to tell her who she should or shouldn't find attractive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D_Lish Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Here's my thoughts: It's the lady's choice if I'm attractive enough for her. If I say up front that she's out of my league, then I've just made a decision for her that was never mine to make. And that's just not a good thing to do on any level. Always let her decide. You don't gain anything by disqualifying yourself and more so, I think it's disrespectful to her to tell her who she should or shouldn't find attractive. I agree. I used to get a lot of mail from guys, who would say 'I know you won't mail back, you are out of my league'.....wth?? They are disqualifying themselves and putting themselves down in the process.....but why even mail if they think they are not good enough?? God loves a tryer I guess.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
girl friend Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 A legendary psychology study springs to mind Clark & Hatfield 1989 Moderately attractive male confederates would approach females. Moderately attractive female confederates would approach males. There were three offers: a date, an invitation to his/her flat, or an invitation to bed. None of the females accepted the invitation to bed. 6% accepted the invitation to his flat. 56% accepted the invitation for a date. However: 75% of the men accepted the invitation to bed. 50% accepted the date. 69% accepted the invitation to her flat. Conclusion: males tend to prefer a greater number of sexual partners than females, and drop their standards considerably for a one night stand. To make this relevant... i suppose it depend how you approach them. What you want and what you come accross as wanting... Mens standards are the highest in terms of intelligence, kindness and looks for a long-term relationship. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 good point gf. i think if the unattractive woman approaches the attractive man, and invites him to bed, he just might take the offer, though that won't necessarily translate into dating. and of course, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. we all have different ideas about what is attractive and what is not.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crush85 Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Say if a woman is not widely considered attractive. Is it right for her to approach men that are generally considered attractive? Are leagues bad, or are they simply how life works? I believe leagues exist, but at the same time love has a funny habit of surprising you when you least expect it. Never count yourself out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nixee Posted September 8, 2008 Share Posted September 8, 2008 Here's my thoughts: It's the lady's choice if I'm attractive enough for her. If I say up front that she's out of my league, then I've just made a decision for her that was never mine to make. And that's just not a good thing to do on any level. Always let her decide. You don't gain anything by disqualifying yourself and more so, I think it's disrespectful to her to tell her who she should or shouldn't find attractive. I agree with this. It isn't up to YOU to decide someone is "out of your league" ... what is the point of this? People can surprise you. I have had guys who have shown attraction to me before, but have let it be known that they would never make a real move on me, because we are in different leagues and thereforee don't "match up"... and so nothing happens... and it just confuses me. While meanwhile another guy, not of any higher attractiveness or in any different "league" himself, can simply have greater self-confidence and let it be known to me that he also finds me attractive and will flirt more.... put on the charm, and let me know he is seriously interested. His interest alone can sometimes spark more interest in me. Confidence is attractive. Confidence alone can shift you into another "league". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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