I just had an epiphany about everything to do with my relationship

[coldplay.]

I suppose this post doesnt ask any specific question or anything or have much relevance to anyone, but i feel the need to talk about it.

 

I had been so down about the breakup, so so so down, every time i gained a little of my life back id fall deeper into despair.

 

Recently, i had been reminded of the song Warning Sign by coldplay, im a pretty big fan if you couldnt tell. For days ive been listening to it, and i couldnt really figure out why, i mean its a song not really meant for the dumpee, but still i was obsessing over it. It came to me as i was walking outside a few minutes ago, for weeks before the breakup i had not been happy, i had thoughts about ending it several times, but for some reason i couldnt communicate my feelings to her, if i tried i just couldnt let out how i felt. After a while i had unknowingly let my unhappiness take its toll on everything, i mean i really did want to make things better, i loved her; but at the same time i really didnt do anything to help it. Then it came, she left me.

 

Now that weve been apart besides the initial epic depression, i feel that i still do love her. I acted desperate after the break up which must have totally confused her, as it was so contrary to how i was acting.

 

I think today is the first day that i can start healing.

 

I just hope one day i can talk to her and have her know, beyond all that has happened i still see her smiling.

[bfla]

That is a tricky epiphany. I had a pretty similar one a few weeks after our breakup, realizing I loved the hell out of her and had been lazy and drove her away.

 

She didn't, uh... agree.

 

(That'll be 3 months ago next week or so.)

[coldplay.]

It seems to present with with a weird situation, i have to deal with being both the dumper and the dumpee on some levels, i mean i am sure that this could be applied to any relationship where someone makes a mistake. I dont know just my thoughts on it.