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Just getting back into dating- how would you play this situation?


byates5637

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Long story short - I'm 24, have dated lots of girls in the past, long term and short, but I have been single and dateless for the last 10 months for a couple reasons (a lack of confidence is a big reason, but this is getting better)

 

Anyway, there is this girl that I went on a camping trip (big group trip, 100 people) with two years ago, and we hooked up two nights in a row. We were really drunk during both hookups. After the trip, we didn't really speak for the next two years. We tried to make plans to hang out via myspace once or twice but it never worked out (I kind of blew her off)

 

So last weekend we went on the same camping trip again, and as soon as we saw each other we clicked. We hooked up again, and ended up sleeping together on the 2nd night.(we were drunk again) A few days after the trip I get a late night drunk phone call from her, and we end up meeting to hang out for a little bit last night.

 

Well a little bit turned into us both drinking beer and having sex all night long. It was really amazing.

 

Anyway, I have found myself completely falling for this girl. The more I get to know about her, the more I realize she is exactly my type. I really could see myself having a LTR with her.

 

So how do I persue her, or do I let her persue me? I really feel like I want to call her and see her all the time, but I know I have to show some restraint to keep things interesting and not reveal my hand too early. So how much contact is too much for this early? How long do I wait before indicating that I am interested in something more then just a sex buddy?

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Try to spend some sober time with her. Drinking can change the way people see each other and can make people feel things that aren't there. It alters the state of the mind and changes the way people behave--so often they cannot be their true selves. How about laying off the booze for a while and getting to know each other?

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Here is some (hopefully helpful) non-sarcastic advice...

 

I'm sure you two have activities/hobbies in common. Invite her to do something (tennis, getting ice cream, a day hike, etc.). Just start to hang out more...I find that relationships naturally evolve. It's not middle school here; you don't ask her, "Okay so you, ummm, like...want to go out with me?"

 

Find non-alcoholic, non-late night activities. You'll find out if you two are compatible or whether you were both young, horny, and thought each other were good lookin' while camping.

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I guess this is good advice. We're not really alcoholics. Last week was just a special occasion.

 

i remember you posting before about some alcohol abuse problems you were having (i think this was over a year ago). please get a handle on that.

 

and i agree with the others - have some 'sober dates' with her to see if the magic is still there.

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