SenorNieve Posted September 5, 2008 Share Posted September 5, 2008 I'm at a loss, and throwing this out to the wind for any thoughts. I'm considering divorce from my wife. 9 years together, 5 of them married. No children. We have always had a rocky relationship, lots of fights about little things that turn into big blowouts. A lot of misunderstanding and misreading of the other partner that turn into problems. Partner suffers from depression, possibly bipolar, low self esteem. Partner is both very emotional and very emotionally needy. I am not very emotional and probably a bit to emotionally distant. Any prolonged trips together always result in a major fight. We also have a trust issue over an emotional affair I was involved in last year. We have seen a therapist about the issue, and were told in our last session that we were not compatible people and life would be much easier apart. We have discussed divorce many times over the last year, and in our escalating fights she has been bringing it up regularly. She has even 'dared' me to break up with her during fights or told me I am too weak to do it. So, I got tired of the years (and years) of fighting and asked for a divorce the other day. She went into a panic attack, then told me all the talk she had about divorce was not reality. She tells me that she is in it for the long term, loves me, and wants to make it work. I do love the woman, but I just don't feel like I have the energy to try again in this relationship. I know we can make it work in the short term, but looking at years from now I cannot see us working together in happiness. I guess mentally I steeled myself for this decision and have moved on. So, basically I told her I was done, and now she is questioning it. Telling me to give it another chance, telling me that I did not give it enough effort etc. I guess right now the future looks much brighter to me single. We have no children, and have no religious beliefs against divorce. It's just so hard for me to hurt this woman, and really sever the tie. Ugh, so confused. Link to comment
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