darkpumpkin Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Do some people enjoy the comfort of knowing they will never be single again? Do some people hate being single so much that when they found a good thing (may not be what they always dreamed of but a good thing none the less) they hold on to it and breath a sigh of relief because they are no longer single? Why do people hate being single so much? I ask because my fiancé hated being single. I've heard him say many times how glad he is that he's not and that he never will be again. I on the other hand have enjoyed being single. It's lonely at times but it's not something for me to hate or fear. I've noticed this with other people as well. People who go through woman or men so fast they barely have time to really get to know them. Yet they are never single very long. Link to comment
thejigsup Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 A healthy person is content and happy whether they are single or married. Happiness comes from within you, not from you relationship status. Link to comment
barbielovesmac Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I've found that I am a much happier person when single. Probably only because every relationship I've ever been in has been a mess... I do love being in a relationship but I do not NEED to be in one to be OK. Nor do I need to be in one to be happy. Link to comment
george237 Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I've found that I am a much happier person when single. Probably only because every relationship I've ever been in has been a mess... I do love being in a relationship but I do not NEED to be in one to be OK. Nor do I need to be in one to be happy. She was reading my mind. Link to comment
metrogirl Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I'm okay with being single but would much prefer to just have that special someone to share my life with. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 A healthy person is content and happy whether they are single or married. Happiness comes from within you, not from you relationship status. I ditto that sentiment. I will also add that a person can never ever say with certainty that they will never be single again. Life can throw you curves and marriages can end in separation and divorce thus leaving a person single. Partners can die, thus leaving a person single. There are plenty of marriages in which there is so little common ground that it is even more lonely than being single. People who are desperate to not be single are not in an emotionally healthy place. A relationship should not define you. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 When I was engaged (Im only eighteen) I used to wonder about never being single again, I had a sucky proposal so I thought 'I'll never get proposed to again...' But luckily for me it didnt work out, I dont particularly mind being single or in a relationship. I like both cos i enjoy my space. Link to comment
Odysseus Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Some people cannot be alone, for various reasons. The problem with this is that many times, they hook up with a lover, partner when they no business entangling them in their life. Whether it's an affair, or a single person on the rebound. The other person ends up in something that is probably destined to failure. And the needy one just cuts them loose when they don't need them anymore. Very sad and destructive...and selfish. IMHO. Link to comment
barbielovesmac Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I'm also very big on my space ... and even more so now that I am living alone. Link to comment
JeckyllNHyde Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 Good question. Being single is fun b/c you always have some crazy adventure and unpredicatble night to look forward to. Some new guy you meet and get excited about, etc. And you go anywhere, with whomever you want without having to tell anyone = total freedom. When my relationship is going well I admit, Ido seem to breathe a sigh of relief that (hopefully) I won't have to go thru another heartache again and it makes me feel good knowing that I have someone to confide in, who feels same as me and who understands me, seeing as I don't have many gal pals. My bf is a bit like my best friend so if we where to split I would feel a bit lost (but I would be ok). I know alot may disagree, but to me relationships seem to be a bit less exciting compared to being single, but there are alot of perks. Link to comment
Karmageddon Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I really have no problems with being single. But I am also with Metrogirl in that, it would be nice to have a special person to share my crazy life with. But that being said, I am not going to try to force a square peg into a round hole so that I don't "have" to be single. I like me & I see no reason to punish myself by living with some jerk b/c of the thought of being single. Single is fun for me. Link to comment
darkpumpkin Posted September 3, 2008 Author Share Posted September 3, 2008 Much agreed. When single there is the moment of being alone or seeing to people share something special that you may want but on the whole it is an adventure, when single you never really know what is going to happen next in life or love. But I would never trade what i have with my partner, the comfort and security and bond. Though I do not believe that it's unhealthy for people to hate being single, if they cannot be happy without being in a relationship is one thing but to hate it yet on the whole be a happy person. Well I just don't believe that's unhealthy. Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I am content with being single for the most part. Going through a phase of kinda not liking it... I posted a blog on my mysp last night. Just one day.... just one... ...................................... Didn't write anything else but the whole thought was, it'd be nice if for one full day, I could fully enjoy a relationship and the thought of it never ending. If that makes sense. Of course it'd be ideal for it to last forever but really - just for a day I'd love to feel that security and confidence and happiness. Link to comment
Mavh25 Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 One of my friends has only been single for a week over the past 7 years She says the idea of being single is something she hates, because she is one of those people who has to be around people, hates being on her own in general... she gets bored VERY easily and finds that if she has a boyfriend she is rarely on her own in her house... I loved my single time personally, did'nt bother me in the slightest once I was over the initial hurt of it all. I don't get it either. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 maybe i'm thinking of someone else, but he's your fiance now? wait, did i ask this on another thread of yours? your posts are so back and forth. Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I was wondering same thing. Did I miss something? And btw - - furthermore on my post above... I do prefer being single rather than settling for sure! Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 ^^ Think he's asking OP Grrrr ^^^ Link to comment
StrawberryYogurt Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 I'm a happy person in general, but a little happier with a GF than without. She enhances my life. Link to comment
barbielovesmac Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 You should never "need" only "want." Link to comment
Seymore Posted September 3, 2008 Share Posted September 3, 2008 While I'm in a relationship now, when I was single I almost hated myself for it. I was just plain unhappy. Now I kinda look back at my single days, sitting inside playing video games or just spending 3 hours sitting outside watching the trees blow in the wind and I kinda say "it really wasn't that bad before". My relationship with my gf is great and I'm happy with it, but very hectic and I can't take the time to do those things I did when I was single all the time. But I think about what life would be like were I to be single again and without my girlfriend and I know I'd miss her in a second. So either way, I would be content, but I really enjoy where I'm at Link to comment
gbpack Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 I guess it just all depends on what kind of person you are and where you are in your life... i had 3 serious relationships from my sophmore year of high school all the way till the end of my junior year in college like one after another... i have now been single for a year and a half now and i love it... i have done so many things i havent done before and the freedom is just amazing and not having to worry about anything....guess i kind of felt like i missed out on things... yes there are advantages of being in a relationship and dont get me wrong i use to be all about relationships, but im 22 years old, the prime age of just enjoying life, meeting as many as people as you can, and living the college life while you can... i do want to get married and settle down eventually but i guess im just not ready for that yet... having too much fun you could say... Link to comment
darkpumpkin Posted September 4, 2008 Author Share Posted September 4, 2008 To Ghost and I'mThatGirl Yes we are engaged, I read back to my posts that started with this guy and I don't think they are as back and forth and you state Ghost. I come here when I'm mad or frustrated, confused and irritated. I look for other people's advice and experience and try to use that to help me though a bad moment. Plus in all honesty I try to make him look worse then he actually is all due to being upset at the time and wanting to be justified in being upset. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 it's still just so fast for me. i can't even fathom. sorry Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 ^^ Me too. And even if you say that you intentionally make him look worse, I lean towards believing you are honest with what he is truly like when you are mad and then dishonest with yourself about how great he is when you are not mad. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted September 4, 2008 Share Posted September 4, 2008 ^^ Me too. And even if you say that you intentionally make him look worse, I lean towards believing you are honest with what he is truly like when you are mad and then dishonest with yourself about how great he is when you are not mad. i agree 5000%. some women never see what is really going on and lie to themselves just to say 'oh we are getting married' 'oh we are in love' 'oh it's so great to finally have someone.' i will never rush and be with someone for the wrong reasons. if i'm alone forever, i'm alone forever. i will never jeopardize my happiness or put myself into situations where i have to mask what is really going on. i see that in these posts. Link to comment
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