porn taking its toll on me ?

[CoryD]

k so i met this girl and basically i can't get it up. it really bugs me because i love her and i want to give her my best. i started dating her about 2 months ago so i can say im comfortable with her. now if i watch porn while im alone then i have no problem getting it up. but during foreplay i cant get it up and it doesnt really matter what she does for me i still cant do it.

if sometimes say i do manage to get it up then it doesnt last long and it goes back limp even while penetration.

 

should i stop watching porn ?

what can i do about this ?

 

 

 

thanks in advance

[Mutley]

You have to quit porn cold turkey.

 

That's the insideous thing about it....it will rob you of your natural sex drive.

 

I gave it up back in '96 for the same reason.

[Seraphim]

Yes, you need to give it up, it conditions your responses to sex, and to thinking subconsciously that sex is something you do alone.

[CoryD]

done and done. thats it with porn for me

 

thanks guys

[ryan123]

maybe you arent physically attracted to her?

[Mutley]

maybe you arent physically attracted to her?

 

That's probably not what's going on here.

[Seraphim]

He said he was. Unfortunately in younger guys porn has a really bad effect. Like everything the brain has to be wired and it get wired with new experiences. If you are younger and the brain has not formed strong pathways to sexual experience and what makes you all hot it can get side tracked by porn and it gets wired into believing you have sex alone and you might not get it up with anyone. A little bit is ok, going over board with the porn thing leads to mountains of issues. Like with everything else, moderation and knowing limits.

[Caterina]

I agree about the porn. Porn has ruined your ability to have sex.

[CoryD]

oh trust me i find her verrrrrry sexy. most guys would have no problem getting it up by even looking at her and thats what makes me sooo mad.

 

is there anything else i can do to repair this problem faster except stop watching porn ?

[lostandhurt]

Go to your doctor and get a blood test. Your hormone levels might be lower for some reason. Eat healthy and cut out drinking for a while. It is the least you can do to get back something that is so enjoyable. Talk to your girl and let her know it is not her! She might be thinking you don't see her a desireable. Make sure she understands that you really want her and are working on it.

 

lost

[ManAbout]

is there anything else i can do to repair this problem faster except stop watching porn ?

 

Dont worry about it so much. You are putting too much pressure on yourself and getting "stage fright". Because it has happened before, you think it is going to happen again.. and guess what it does happen again, just because you expect it to. You are in a self perpetuating cycle.

 

Next time you are with your gf, don't even try to go for penetration. Let her arouse you in other ways with her hands or with a blowjob. Even if you get hard, dont try to penetrate her right away. Just enjoy the feeling of having an erection when you are with her. Please her in other ways as well, with your fingers or by going down on her. Maybe rub up against her when you are erect without actual penetration. And soon enough it will just happen.

[CoryD]

thing is with my x i used to be hard all the time. whenever i was with her, even dancing with her would get me hard and i could last for hours with no problem and that was while i was watching porn as well.. maybe i was more comfortable with my x than with the current gf and soon enough i'll get to that stage again...

[george237]

I don't think that is your problem. Could be a few reasons. 1. if you take any type of medication (especially steroids) that could do it. 2. You might be thinking about it too much (it happened once so it is in the back of your mind that it will happen this time) 3. She doesn't turn you on (she might be hot but maybe she isn't sexy enough to ge tyou in the mood). 4. You are nervous around her for some reason.

[CoryD]

1. im not on any steroids

2. i DO think about it too much

3. she does turn me on but with no physical evidence

4. i was a bit nervous at the beginning but now i'm pretty open and comfortable with her.

[george237]

I am telling you there is something you are thinking that is doing it. Try closing your eyes and remembering your ex, know this sounds bad, when you are with her. Just make sure you don't say her name.

[Casanova]

Umm, yea, obviously stop watching porn. Also you may have some sort of anxiety that is messing up your sex drive. This may or may not have something to do with ur sex drive. For a quick fix get some viagra, despite what critics say, it's very safe and pretty easy to get. But it does work very well.

 

Your hormones are probably pretty low. Go to the gym and workout 4-5 times a week (primarily weights). Improve your diet, eat a high protein/low carb diet. Eliminate junk food, sodas, processed foods. Go for runs on the weekend or some type of execise. You'll be surprised at how much your sex drive will improve. And stop watching or reading porn!! Or anything sexual!!

[madmarten]

Yeah, one thing I would add to others' advice. It sounds like you re mostly nervous around her when it comes to sex. Well most guys have problems getting it up when they are stressed and nervous. If you want to kill a boner faster than anything, think getting talked down by your boss or something, major buzzkill.

 

Anyway, just spend time with her making out, getting comfortable with each other and being sexual with other. It sounds like you are worried about what she'll think about you and trying to impress her to much that you are getting nervous.

 

Trying and having just one or two drinks first to put you in a relaxed mood. Keep it light and humorous. Sex is so supposed to be fun and often times funny, not too serious.

[CoryD]

done and done.

 

thanks guys

[Red Fox]

It is probably likely that this could be due to nerves.

 

"ED is very common..... In younger males, the most frequent cause is anxiety – particularly nervousness about having sex, about causing a pregnancy, or about using a condom."

 

"Common psychological causes of erection difficulties include:

 

* nerves - especially about performing"

 

"Are many cases due to psychological causes?

 

Yes, particularly in the young. In general, erectile dysfunction is quite likely to be psychological rather than physical if the man:

 

* is still waking with morning erections

 

* can still get a good erection by masturbation. " link removed

 

Would you say it's more likely nerves?

[drewciouS281]

the same thing used to happen to me man. Not like i watched porn all the time but your brain becomes dependent on some sort of visual aid for an erection. My specific problem was if i didnt receive head before sex, i wouldnt be hard enough for sex. This problem is more common than you know. Its all in the brain. A friend told me this method to help fix this. Try laying in bed relaxing, masturbate with no sex, no porn, no women in mind. Just keep a clear mind and focus on what your feeling. It may take time but eventually it will cure your problem. No more porn though! If you want to try herbal solutions try Yohimbe extract or Red Rooster. By what i mean that its all in the brain is that your brain is used to you being aroused only by watching porn. You need to get your brain used to being aroused by just the normal sensations of being aroused and not needing a visual aid.