habsrule30 Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 my gf broke up with me about amonth ago after 7 months and i know she loved me very much. Within two days she found anopther guy and theyv been dating since. I tried several times to go no contact but within a few days give up and e start talking. The thing is though when we talk she becomes so attached wants to see me everyday calls me and texts all day long. I know she ahs feelings for me because her friends even say she changes her mind daily. I consytantly make the mistake of seeing her everytime she asks and its ridiculous but if i can only have her as a friend than thats what ill settle for. The problem is in my mind we'll never just be friends. what do you suggest i do:S Link to comment
Seraphim Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Do not have contact with her AT ALL. She is no longer with you, she is with someone else. Would you want another man to be under handed and want to steal your woman??? Stop the victim behavoir and move the heck on. Link to comment
girl68 Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 You grow up, get a pair of balls, and move on. Only then are you ready to see her as a friend. Also tell her she's being an incredibly bad gf (to her new man) as well as a terrible "friend" to you. If she really "cared" about you she would be WITH you. If she respected you enough she's realize she's not helping you by doing this to you. You need to also tell her to grow up. Be a good gf, stop leading you on, and give you some space to get over it. That's what you should do. Tell her to smarten the hell up- or else don't whine and complain you can't get over her. I'll be the one to tell you as blunt as it is. Link to comment
j.man Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 You grow up, get a pair of balls, and move on. Only then are you ready to see her as a friend. Also tell her she's being an incredibly bad gf (to her new man) as well as a terrible "friend" to you. If she really "cared" about you she would be WITH you. If she respected you enough she's realize she's not helping you by doing this to you. You need to also tell her to grow up. Be a good gf, stop leading you on, and give you some space to get over it. That's what you should do. Tell her to smarten the hell up- or else don't whine and complain you can't get over her. I'll be the one to tell you as blunt as it is.You can claim to be as blunt as you'd like, but you're still throwing in expletives left and right to contradict it. The attitude's highly unnecessary, as well as the assertions of the ex-girlfriend who you know nothing of. If she's not kissing him, grabbing his hand, specifically stating the chances of this or that happening, she's pretty much in the clear just being friendly towards him, regardless of what she says to her friends. Habsrule, if this is hurting you, you do need to try and avoid it. I, nor anyone else here can tell her her intentions. Maybe she just wants to be friends and enjoy your personality without the romantic aspects. Maybe after having had time and finally seeing you again, in whatever context, she's starting to remember and validate the reasons she loved you before. I don't know what you've said to her, but I would make it politely clear that you're not ready to just be friends, or that you don't believe you'll ever be ready for that if such is the case. That way, if she is just looking to be your friend, she'll most likely respect your emotions (and if she doesn't, it may make it even easier for you to let go) and let you go. If she's contemplating thoughts of being with you again, she'll have to weigh the chances against her feelings for the man she's with now. If she truly loves you, you know the choice she'll make. I wouldn't tell you to "grow a pair," but just stand tall, be clear and respectful, and make your point. If she's anyone worth loving as much as you love her, she'll respect and abide by what you request in this scenario. Link to comment
yankeefan74 Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Great post, Jman. I agree. It's not habsrule's job to tell her to be a better girlfriend to this other guy...it's not his job to tell her to grow up. his only job here is too take care of himself. Link to comment
habsrule30 Posted September 2, 2008 Author Share Posted September 2, 2008 thanks alot and dont worry im not insulted by one of the posts everything is true. This was my first real relationship and im just having difficulties handeling it because i did really love her and i dont want her out of my life but i also know it would be easier without her. Thanks for al lthe advice but your right i do have to tell her to pick her priorities Link to comment
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