nick_knock Posted August 31, 2008 Share Posted August 31, 2008 Hey guys, First of all, sorry for the long winded message, but i really need some more advice. Well i've managed to find myself another girlfriend, have been trying really hard to get over my trust issues but havent been going to well. My current girlfriend isnt helping the issues either. First of all, i met my current girlfriend on the internet, we chatted for a couple of months. In that time, she was very flirty, would sometimes become quite sexual over the phone and or over MSN which was because i thought she liked me. During that time, i knew she had been with a lot of guys, around roughly 20 - 25 (i say that because she doesnt know) But had never been in a relationship for approx 3 yrs because she apparantely is to scared to. Since we have been together, it's been quite difficult getting any kind of affection from her, she never discusses her feelings towards me.. sometimes it's really quite difficult to even have sex with her. I admit that i have a really bad habit of going through my partners phones when i suspect something is up. Last night, i was having a hard time sleeping. In the past, she has mentioned a few times that she doesnt have anything on her phone worth me worrying about therefore she doesnt delete messages in fear of me reading them. So last night, i read on her phone (a new phone since we have been together) messages from 3 or 4 different guys. Quite flirty and sexual messages saying things like "oh your boyfriend gone now hey, maybe we can play" "hey babe, i miss you it sucks you boyfriend wont let you catch up with your friends, yeah just do it while hes away" "i miss you being so naughty, how about one last pic of you?" and "oh yeah im still being naughty, still with my girl but when she's busy i'll still be playin around.. maybe we can catch up for some fun soon?" and the last one that only happened a couple of days ago which upset me the most was from some random guy she met online who lives in a different state saying "hey, how you doing?" which she replied "yeah going well, got myself a bloke, thinking about settling down soon" Now to me, that sounds really * * * * ty and i still dont understand why she couldnt have said "yeah, met a nice guy.." and left the settling down part out of it. I confronted her about it last night, she got all angry and turned it around on me, making me feel like i'm the one who has done wrong for not trusting her. In saying that, her phone only held 20 sent messages so i was unable to read her replies to most of the messages except the one saying shes thinking about settling down. I will admit that in most of the messages i have read, the random guy has asked about me and asked how things are going with us before the guy starts talking dirty to her. She said to me last night that all of her replies were innocent and werent dirty replies.. i'm not sure if that is true or whether or not she just knows that her phone only holds 20 sent messages so i'd have no way of finding out. I understand and accept that she has been with a lot of guys. I'm really confused as to whether she likes me or not, she certainly doesnt come out and say it very often. I unfortunately told her that i loved her after a month, whilst we were having sex. We do hold hands in public and will kiss in public, we act like a great couple in public and her family and friends like me.. She has introduced me to her whole family at a recent party. We spend most weekends together and it's great. She has asked me to go away on a trip in a months time just to spend time together with her. We have spent a lot of time over the past day organizing it. When we are together we do have a lot of fun and she very rarely gets messages or phone calls from random guys. If she does, she only tells me half of what the sender/caller wanted for instance her ex David sent her a message saying "hey how was the night in the slippery puss-Y , oops i meant slippery fish? Do you have my robby williams dvd" She told me that it was her ex asking for his dvd back and that was all. We have been together just over 2 months now and i'm really worried that i'll just be another notch on the belt and that she's not really ready to settle down and just have one guy. I've asked her to her face and she said that she is.. i really want to believe her and trust her. All her friends seem to like me and are always making comment about how its good she has found a normal guy. I work away from home a lot, so it's quite concerning and it's doing my head in thinking that when she hangs up the phone to me of a night time sayin how tired she is and that she's going to sleep, that she's messaging another guy and flirting with him. The question i have for you all, is a) am i being over protective again and not trusting or b) should i be worried that she is still messaging guys that she had a "thing" with, that she told me she never speaks to anymore and finally c) am i being to paranoid as we have only been together a short time, that feels like a lot longer. Thanks Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.