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how do you flirt with strangers?


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I know a little smile is a good option.. but I'm kind of shy and I tried but can't seem to be able to smile to a random guy even if I find him attractive.. it just seems to me like a weird thing .. also, concerning eye contact, I am good looking and I've noticed that whenever I make eye contact with someone, I ususally grab their attention, but I find myself not looking at them again .. eventhough in my head I SO want to look again.. but I just don't .. if I am on a bus/train .. I'll just pretend to be so interested in that BORING article or I'd just close my eyes and "rest".. so I need advice on how to fix this situation .. because I do understand that if I don't smile or make eye contact .. I'm just making it harder for the guy to make a step and talk .. thx all for your advice..

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I consider myself to be very social and confident when talking with anyone, not just women.


I feel successful flirting involves returning whatever was sent your way, if you are interested. A smile for a smile or when someone says hello, try to continue the conversation. Usually there is a period of "feeling someone out" before you ask for a phone number. So make eye contact again, "be open and receptive" dont turn away, pay more attention to that boring article or close your eyes. I would think you were not interested or you were trying to shooo me away.

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Been on that boat, almost drowned in those murky seas of seriousness and self-importance. Nowadays I tend to think of something funny and highly inappropriate in such situations, for me this 'overrides' the aversion instinct that acts as a sort of self-preservation mechanism against rejection. Not only does this shift the focus off the 'oh my god what if they don't return the look/gesture/invitation' but actually changes the body's chemistry by realising various 'feel good' endomorphins making outward appearance much more friendly, fun and approachable.


For instance, I was in a supermarket queue the other day and a rather nice looking young woman was on the check-out, the old ticker started going and I starting stiffening up (not that in region, before you ask) and then I suddenly thought of a stupid joke I remembered on the Reeves and Mortimer show


Man: "have you checked the flights dear"?

Woman: "Why no, where are we going"?

Man: "The pub, it's my big darts match tonight"!


Te he he.


Anyway it got me through the altercation all 'light n breezy', and she politely smiled. She didn't shoot off with me into the sunset on the back of my motorbike with the tune 'take my breath away' playing in the background, but there's always next week. For me, the whole thing is just a case of altering the automatic response and turning your mind onto something else that you enjoy or find humorous and that kind of 'frees up' the self-consciousness aspect.

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