george237 Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 I have been seeing this girl for a short period and thought she was great. Last week I sort of had the talk with her. I said I can't hop in a relationship but I would love to see her more and don't need to see anyone else. I said I just got out of a ltr and I am enjoying my freedom. Well last night I met up with her and her friends at a bar. We had fun, I met her friends, we were dancing, laughing and then my phone rang. I told her I would be right back. It was a buddy of mine about a trip we are doing next week, so I took the call outside. When I come back in she starts questioning me about who I was on the phone with and even asked to see my phone. I was shocked and refused to show her my phone because it is absolutley ludicrous. Any way I chalked that up as she was a little drunk and said the wrong thing. A little later we made our way to a dif part of the bar and I ran into a bar tender I know. She offered both of us free drinks and was talking to me occasionally just to catch up. Well date asked to go to the bathroom, I walk her there. When we are walking she starts drilling me about the bar tender and if we were ever together and why she was flirting with me. Well I had it at that point and told her I wasn't feeling too hot and I was going to call it a night. Never calling her again. What is wrong with people? I thought I found someone interesting and fun and she turns out to be a phsyco. Link to comment
Love_Music Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 It's not that she's psycho lol (well not yet anyway) I guess she's just WAY too jealous for you Link to comment
Laura11111 Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 She's probably been cheated on before and can't trust men. Link to comment
independantgal Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 I agree, she probobly has some issues that have happened in her past. Maybe she was with someone that as already stated cheated on her or constantly lied to her. She may now regard all men the same as her ex. I've had similar issues with insecurity. If one guy got bored of me, goes through my mind that *everyone will* and it sometimes causes me to think irrational say if a guy doesnt text me back etc Its obviously not true but its hard not to resort to thinking those sort of thoughts. I never really let my feelings surface, maybe she finds it difficult. Link to comment
george237 Posted August 30, 2008 Author Share Posted August 30, 2008 Too much for me. If she is acting like that now imagine how she would be in a few months? No thank you. It's a shame too because everything else about her is great. I agree, she probobly has some issues that have happened in her past. Maybe she was with someone that as already stated cheated on her or constantly lied to her. She may now regard all men the same as her ex. I've had similar issues with insecurity. If one guy got bored of me everyone will and it sometimes causes me to think irrational say if a guy doesnt text me back etc I never really let those feelings surface, maybe she finds it difficult. Seriously wouldn't you hide that sort of thing? I mean she just layed into me I was thrown off guard both times. Link to comment
independantgal Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 well yeah, I'm fine with hiding it now. I never bring something up unless I know it won't resort to him actually thinking that I'm insecure. It can be very hard to hold back though sometimes. With me the feeling can be too intense that i just need answers. Before now I've actually called a guy up and sounded really needy asking him if he still likes me...eurgh wasn't pretty. Link to comment
Laura11111 Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 You are right not to call her again. I'm sure the problem will only get worse and you don't want to deal with that. It is too bad. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 She probably finds it hard to trust and because she may have been cheated on and hurt badly. It is hard to trust again, once you have been cheated on btw. I find it hard to trust, however I do trust until I'm given good reason and cause not to. I don't pounce every two minutes, 'who was that', 'why are you talking to her' or give the third degree...lol Shame that so many cheating men, will spoil it for the 'good' guys eh? Link to comment
Clarity Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 Shame that so many cheating partners, will spoil it for the 'good' people, eh? fixed your sentence for ya. Link to comment
D_Lish Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 fixed your sentence for ya. Yes thanks.... lol Link to comment
thinkstoohard Posted August 30, 2008 Share Posted August 30, 2008 Yes thanks.... lol Haha, I was just about to do the EXACT same thing! Link to comment
ZeldaPrinces Posted August 31, 2008 Share Posted August 31, 2008 But wait hang on...obviously she has been treated badly in the past by a man...and you have just further made her insecure by not calling her. No wonder she acts the way she does when men keep leaving her just because she's trying to protect herself. How is that fair? It dosen't kill you that she questions you, but its killing her inside not knowing. Link to comment
ImThatGirl Posted August 31, 2008 Share Posted August 31, 2008 I have been seeing this girl for a short period and thought she was great. Last week I sort of had the talk with her. I said I can't hop in a relationship but I would love to see her more and don't need to see anyone else. I said I just got out of a ltr and I am enjoying my freedom. I don't think it's fair to assume that just because she flipped out a little that she's been cheated on or in a bad relationship. You said you *can't hop in a relationship* but that *you'd love to see her more and don't need to see anyone else*... And that you **love your freedom**... Maybe she doesn't know what to think.... some girls hear *love my freedom* and think "he's not ready to settle down." I don't know.. just some food for thought. Sorry that this happened George - know ya were completely into this girl. Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted August 31, 2008 Share Posted August 31, 2008 I don't think it's fair to assume that just because she flipped out a little that she's been cheated on or in a bad relationship. You said you *can't hop in a relationship* but that *you'd love to see her more and don't need to see anyone else*... And that you **love your freedom**... Maybe she doesn't know what to think.... some girls hear *love my freedom* and think "he's not ready to settle down." I don't know.. just some food for thought. Sorry that this happened George - know ya were completely into this girl. I agree. Yes, she over-reacted...but on the other hand your intentions regarding her are rather wishy washy and unclear...you don't want an official relationship with her, want your freedom and yet are telling her you don't need to see anyone else. Those contradictory messages would not inspire me to trust the guy who said that...I too might be assuming that he was on the prowl looking for something better to come along. Link to comment
May_It_Be Posted August 31, 2008 Share Posted August 31, 2008 Whoa, too much baggage ... or alcohol, but whatever, I'd steer clear. She apparently has her own issues to work through, whether that be through a therapist or AA. Link to comment
george237 Posted September 1, 2008 Author Share Posted September 1, 2008 I agree. Yes, she over-reacted...but on the other hand your intentions regarding her are rather wishy washy and unclear...you don't want an official relationship with her, want your freedom and yet are telling her you don't need to see anyone else. Those contradictory messages would not inspire me to trust the guy who said that...I too might be assuming that he was on the prowl looking for something better to come along. Your right, maybe I wasn't being that clear with what I wanted, but I don't think I made her think I was trying to find someone better. I was just telling her that I just got out of a ltr and I still need me time. She seemed ok with it and then the next night this happened. Link to comment
Tethys Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 She sounds jealous and controlling to me. You two aren't in a relationship, right? Why is she grilling you? Link to comment
tina-rocks Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 Classic case of drink and the Green eyed monster. Were not all like that but there are some. It's a shame people have those feelings must be awful for them if you think about it. Link to comment
george237 Posted September 1, 2008 Author Share Posted September 1, 2008 Well to all the gals out there don't act like this. Not a turn-on. Link to comment
Portage Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 George, why are you responding to all of these other posters?? When is it MY turn?? Link to comment
Tethys Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 LOL, Portage. Insecurity is never a turn-on. She is insecure, for whatever reason. Does not mean you have to put up with it. Link to comment
SexinmyCity Posted September 1, 2008 Share Posted September 1, 2008 well at least she was honest??? And gave you the opportunity to RUN before you were too ensnared, enmeshed etc. Maybe she is normal...that's scary. Link to comment
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