a little update

[Pappers]

Hey everyone,

 

So almost 2 weeks ago I wrote my 'really hard news' post because I was feeling super low after finding out my ex was now dating a woman he cheated on me with. It really helped to put stuff down, and it helped me through the night.

 

Thing is, the next day I felt ok... not great, but a whoooole lot better. It wasn't till later that afternoon that I realized what it was - I WAS NO LONGER IN LOVE WITH HIM!! It was like that huge emotional blow was enough pain to eliminate the love feelings I was still hanging on to.... like my brain shutting off the love so that I would never be that upset again.

 

Anyway, it felt really great to realize I no longer loved him. Of course the break up still hurts, but I felt so different than before.

 

Right before I found out about his new dating lifestyle I was counting the days of my NC. Every day was slowly ticking by. But on the day I realized he did not deserve my love and that I finally didn't love him anymore, the NC days just didn't matter.... I no longer started counting the days, thinking about him as much, or even wanting to talk / hear / see / communicate in any way! I'm still feeling like this after a couple weeks.

 

So this is good I think.

 

I am not over him by any means, but he is no longer someone I am in love with.

[Caterina]

WOOOH HOOO! I know the feeling, its WONDERFUL. Go out and celebrate with the girls! Yeah, you might still hurt from time to time but this is a milestone

[SBCorkern]

you at least know that your ex cheated on you. i am the ex that did cheat on his gf and she dumped me b/c her "friends" from over 2 hours away were telling her that that is what i was doing.

 

do you have any suggestions for me?

 

-sbc-

[Caterina]

you at least know that your ex cheated on you. i am the ex that did cheat on his gf and she dumped me b/c her "friends" from over 2 hours away were telling her that that is what i was doing.

 

do you have any suggestions for me?

 

-sbc-

 

So you didn't actually cheat?

[SBCorkern]

never even thought about it.................i do landscaping and own my own business, so when i went to work (Louisiana) it was usually around 3 or 4 in the evening. the sex went to hell (i was tired) and the attentiveness that i gave her went to * * * * b/c of me being soooo tired. after she broke up with me, i heard on the radio that there were 10 signs that you man is cheating on you and i got mad as hell when i heard them. later in the week, i got online, did a search about that subject, and started crying b/c i exhibited 6 - 7 out of 10 of the "tale tell" signs.

 

i loved and still love this woman with all that i am and have been in NC with her for 28 days; is there any chance?

 

-sbc-

[SBCorkern]

the first post that i sent was supposed to read "DIDN'T CHEAT ON."

 

-sbc-

[Caterina]

never even thought about it.................i do landscaping and own my own business, so when i went to work (Louisiana) it was usually around 3 or 4 in the evening. the sex went to hell (i was tired) and the attentiveness that i gave her went to * * * * b/c of me being soooo tired. after she broke up with me, i heard on the radio that there were 10 signs that you man is cheating on you and i got mad as hell when i heard them. later in the week, i got online, did a search about that subject, and started crying b/c i exhibited 6 - 7 out of 10 of the "tale tell" signs.

 

i loved and still love this woman with all that i am and have been in NC with her for 28 days; is there any chance?

 

-sbc-

 

Thats terrible. But to me, if she couldn't trust you even if you would never do it...there are deeper issues ...that either lie in her or in you...and only you know who is truly the culprit, deep down, if you know what I mean.

 

If you're the culprit: change your ways and try again later with her or another woman. If she's the culprit: give yourself time to get over her.