Should I Wait or Lead by Example?

[blue_dahlia]

I’ve been hanging out with my ex for a month with LC. Tuesday I learned that reconciliation is possible. I asked for more interaction between dates. He said understood. He also said that I never text or call either (true). I have mirrored his actions.

 

Wednesday night he came over, and we had an amazing time. It was easy going, loving and playful.

 

This morning I woke with a hint of concern. Will he be able to commit to more conversation between dates? I know that it’s useless to worry.

 

Part of me wants to wait to see if he's capable of doing what I asked. The other part wants to show him what I need by demonstration i.e. send him an occasional text, call him sometimes, etc. I'm not talking about today, just in general.

 

What should I do? How will I ever know if he’s capable of reaching out to me if I don’t wait for him to come to me?

 

Your thoughts are appreciated!

[WlknCntrdiction]

Don't read too much into things and don't overthink things. You two enjoy each others company, just leave it like that, things will develop naturally, if you try to "force" them then thats when things can and will most likely go wrong.

 

I'm not saying you shouldn't do or say anything but why rock the boat now? Especially when you've just got back into contacting each other, you don't want to put any pressure on him and technically you guys are not together yet so you can't be making "demands" of him because he is still single atm, just as you are too.

[Supa_gurl]

Congratulations Blue on the possible reconciliation. Just continue to do what he has asked and once he sees that you are capable of keeping up your end of the bargain, maybe he will show he can too. Just take it easy. Praying for ya girl! ((hugs))

[GoldenHillGuy]

Don't rush it like I did. I probably had a pretty good shot at reconciling, but I pushed the issue, asked her where we stood, and quickly got handed the friend card. Don't scare him. Take it easy.

[blue_dahlia]

Thank you for your comments Wilkn

 

I don't feel that asking for some conversation between dates is making demands; It's communicating my needs. Plus whether we're together or not, I am allowed to share what makes me happy. It was a breezy conversation that we had. I'm not expecting daily interaction, just something more.

[blue_dahlia]

Hi everyone!

 

I'm not planning on rushing anything. I'm not talking about today.

 

I'm just curious if I should wait for him to correspond first? Or, if it's acceptable for me to say something in a few days?

[sine]

yeah, patience & reducing expectation on him and yourself. that's the way to go...

 

expectation is always the killer imho.

[blue_dahlia]

Supa!! I've been worried about you. Are you doing ok?

[blue_dahlia]

Just an update:

 

K sent me a text at noon that said, "I hope that you are having a wonderful day."

 

I'm happy.

[Supa_gurl]

Yes, I'm fine. I just don't get on ENA on my days off much, but I stay on it at work. Tsk Tsk on me. Anyhow, glad things are going well so far. Keep me in the loop

[blue_dahlia]

Ok, so K works the first five nights of the month. I sent him a text yesterday at 5:00 p.m. that said, "I would like to see you before you work nights."

 

I have heard nothing. Last night I was a little sad because I do miss him. However, his lack of contact isn't concerning to me because he doesn't carry his phone all the time. Yesterday, there was an outdoor concert he was going to try to go to in another town five hours away plus there's a big festival in town. I assume he did one of the two. He will most likely respond today. He would work tomorrow night so that doesn't give us any time really to spend together. I'm at work today until six.

 

I'm back to laying low again. I'm retreating into NC land. The ball is now in his court.